Thoughts Xpress

:) :) fOrGiVeN

2011-12-28T11:49:00.002-05:00

Now, this is THE awesomest thing any guy has ever ever ever done for me!! I was all smiles :) :)

Ok, so Mr. you are forgiven finally!! :):) and this time real wala! :D.

Oh, did I ever tell you - you have one of the cutest smiles I have come across :). I love the fact that you are this silent observer of my blog, but make sure to cross question me every, every single time I post something - you BETTER comment on THIS one or else I am NOT talking to you again! I love the way you have most of the time given me gyaan which ALL the time goes like "ab kya kar sakte hain, sab aise nahin hote" :)

Oh, ya I love your dressing style too - most of the times :P. Every single time I have been worked up you have heard me out patiently...and that dabba of toffes purple wala, yep I m gonna store it for a long long time:). You are one of the calmest people I know, though you are a just about mediocre dancer :P :)

I also love ur craze about non - veg food *wonders how your are so thin*. Hoping NOT to hear any more lame stuff!!! ok, I shall STOP my sarcasm here :P

Thanks a ton for all the manofying you have done over the past many days :P I am tough girl, u c -tabhi itna natak :D Oh but me thinks you dEsErVeD it!! *glares*

Ok, anyways please NEVER ever say things like that. NEVER! :)

P.S. I miss you! :(

P.P.S. Oh btw, I totally adore the way you interact with Sharon - kaash mere saath ek baar waise behave kara hota * sad sigh*

P.P.P.S. Take care of yourself! :)

Just NOT those types...

2011-12-23T12:15:00.000-05:00

The day started pretty ok, but well as it progressed - it didn't turn out to be one of my best days! It just wasn't as fruitiful as I would expect each of my days to be till Feb 2012. So this irritated me tried to pep up things in her life. They say that shopping helps one destress et all. I anyways had to use my WWD gift vouchers before the year ends since it's expiry date is mentioned as 31/12/2011.(I totally detest shopping and had been pushing it off for quite sometime now!). So I went shopping, hoping that it would change my sullen mood. Also, I thought since no one would be getting me a New year's gift, might as well gift myself! :D

So, out I went to Inorbit. After checking out like a gazzillion things (Shoes, perfumes,.....blah blah) and umpteem number of calls to my sis, well I DID NOT buy anything *sad sigh*. Some conversations

Me to the guy at the mall : Elizabeth Arden sunflower perfume? *hopeful eyes*

Smiles and replies : No Ma'am *felt like punching his nose*

Why are the things that I totally adore, so difficlut to find?!! *wondering*

Me to my sis on the fone: "Yarr they don't have the one I am looking for, suggest some good perfume na"

My sis: "Kuch aur le le".

After 7-8 mins-

Me to my sis on the phone: "Heels lun ya flats?"

My sis: "comfort dekh, though heels look awesome"

Me: "hmmm" *as confused as ever*

So well, I realised that I am just NOT those types who would feel better post shopping - infact I felt worse! :P I hate shopping!! Wonder how people find it a stress buster, in my case it only adds to it :P Luckily I am blessed to have sisters who shop and send stuff for me!

On the way back from Class, I and my friend went for an ice-cream. Though Baskin & Robin didn't have my favourite flavour read choco mint (Just one of those days, when things just don go all that great) I enjoyed my banana strawberry flavour to the hilt! :) Now, this is what I call bLiSs. It for sure helped me ease out the stress and foul mood :D :)

Talks with Ruchi, who will be a married lady in less than 4 days - OMG!!! and Kavita and well I am all smiles.

P.S. Atul, I am NOT talking to you!! *glares*

P.P.S. Dec month, chilly eve, Jal ka song on, ice cream, great company, useless talks :P....bliss!! :) :)

P.P.P.S. Merry Christmas guys!! Have a blessed one! :)

whhyyy??

2011-12-19T11:35:00.001-05:00

.....And why does my bIrThDaY month seem like a life time away??!!!

Aaahhh...the waittt!!!!

P.S. If only people would just let me be and NOT advice!!

P.P.S. Walks in the month of december are JUST awesomeeeee, especially from Inorbit to Vashi stn. in the nite :):)

Humbled :)

2011-12-14T12:05:00.001-05:00

That's how I feel, truely humbled!

So, so, sooooo much love!! Feels mAgIcAl, absolutely MAGICAL!!!!! :):):):)

:)

2011-12-13T12:21:00.000-05:00

She walked the long distance her eyes not leaving his for a single second; her white colored gown sweeping the floor. He looked handsome in a white tuxedo.

His eyes admired her top to bottom, the woman he had always truely loved. The red colored roses on her hair added color to her otherwise plain outfit. Her face was a gammut of emotions. He looked at her encouraginly, she gave a nervous smile.

After what seemed like an eternity to him, she stood opposite him. Near him. He could feel her breath and her perfume. It was all playing havoc on him. He smiled into her
nervous eyes.

".... You may now kiss your bride.." The father whispered.

He sealed his lips with hers, a tear rolled down her cheek.

At last, they were one.

P.S. Dec is like MY bestest month of the year, there's something anout this month that makes my heart go "awwww" types :D

Oh!! ya I totally love going for strolls in the evenings in the month of dec :) It's just Magical!

...to an end comes yet another phase of my liFE...

2011-12-10T11:01:00.001-05:00

While I sat in the rick for the last time with Kavita and Parikshit, having left work at 6.45 in the evening ( very late in a looong looong time, cos I had become totally shameless ever since I had put down my papers), numb is how I felt. Parikshit yelling in my left ear and Kavita in my right one, I had to feel numb :P!!! While I sat worrying by what time I would reach home and how worked up my dad would be (nd my sis too *sad sigh*), I realised that the book gifted to me was just puuurrffeecct for me, the book's called "How to stop worrying and start living! :)

Going through a bad phase - crying sessions with Hari for a job- Juliet calling me - interview in the middle of my sleep at 3.00 PM on a thursday - formal interview after 4 days with Salima, taken for a ride by the rickwala - No news from Q - Another interview with Prashant- No news from Q- Another interview with Shweta - Written on my resume was "excellent candidate" -self confidence increased -wait for that one call- Juliet calls on Fri at 6 in the eve- Confirmation of my first ever job- go to collect my appointment letter- compliment from Juliet " You look pretty" - Orientation on 26 May 2010 - First one-to-one with Suruchi - probable FDA inspection- late working hours- First paycheck - those tears & gifts- Vivek - Amrapali - Jitu - Trip to Alibaug - Banana & bumper ride- the fun - Performance rating - stand up for what I feel is correct - Office picinic - outcast - Atul, Avi, Parikshit, Gaurav - Ananya, Jayashree :) - Meghna - first ever increment in life - From nowhere Kavita :) - Fun frolic - happiness, laughter- Compactor - projects & deadlines - Cribbing & kavita, gifts & Kavita - yelling & Atul - Complaints & Parikshit - Pantry with Kavita & Parikshit - cribbing & crying - Bitching about her :P - feeling of stagnancy & realisation - decision time - putting down papers - that talk with Jitu :) - EAD - EAD - EAD - practise - masti - time pass - transitions - running from work to class- work & more work - pantry rounds with Parikshit & Kavita - the last week - mixed feelings - the letters - the roses :) - the last day - sad- very very sad - the gifts!! :) :) - and some more gifts - and some more gifts - the controlling of tears - the farewell cake - the blank feeling looking at everyone's face - trying hard not to cry and failing miserably - Deepika - tears!! - Amrapali - tears!! - the movie by Vivek - more tears!! - the final goodbye by Vivek - hit me HARD and when he put his hand on my head - numb feeling- hugging Avi, Atul, Parikshit - Sharon :) - switching off my system- that smile of Jitu - handing over my access card to the security - final sign on the register - Kavita, Parikshit and I in rick - Bandra - Global Fusion - horrible food :P - awesome ambience - awesomesssstttt people - Pathetic dessert :P - that final hug with Kavita - that feeling of leaving a part of me behind - me and Parikshit in cab - yelling Kavita - she busy wiping her tears - that drive back home - that talk with Parikshit :) - reaching home calling Kavita - calling Parikshit - messaging Vivek - messaging Atul - clicking pics of the gifts and sending to Vamsi - trying to write something - too overwhelmed - sleep

It's been an excellent journey in Q, minus the negative people around me and her :P. Whom all should I thank for such an excellent and overwhelming day -

Parikshit & Kavita for all the wonderful things they did for me? ( Expect the part, when Kavita left midway during the actual farewell wala thingie in the pantry, were u crying? :P and Parikshit who refused to speak a couple of good things abt me!! *sad sigh*

Avi for those wonderful earrings - Atul, Sharon, Ruella, Gaurav for the wonderful card and bracelet-Atul for that chocolate ka dabba & getting the transition plan in place - Jayashree & Ananya for the bracelet - Fedora for that letter- Vivek for that movie- Meghna for the chocolate- Amrapali for the dress - Parikshit & Kavita for the awesome coffee mug with our pic :) - Novels :) - the gift wrappers :) -the entire lot for the farewell cake - good words from Meghna , Janvi, Fedora - that hugs, sooo sooo many! :)

P.S. ....At my emotional best!!

P.P.S. Kavita, thanks for the dinner - I often wonder how can some one be soo sooo giving?! And sooo adorable! The funniest part was when I told you "I din like the food ". You laughed and told " I never like the food yahan ka" :P :P and then you went on to say" but I love the ambience". But I love you, and when you call me Cindreall, I actually feel like ONE! :) Funny I never flet that way even a single time when guys have complimented me! The way u reacted when I held your waist when we went to get ourselves the dumbest ever variety of dessert and told - "mera yahan ek impression hai, bigaad mat " :P

Oh, I lovedddd the ambience too! Sure shot, I am going to make a trip there with my guy real soon :)

Oh and ya ya...I love the way you love YOUR Bandra!! :) Muaaahh!

P.P.P.S. I love you all guys!! :) Thanks a ton!

Happy bday to the boy who is scared whilst crossing the rOaD!!

2011-12-07T13:04:00.001-05:00

Since, I am aware of the fact that you totally detest reading; I shall try and keep this as short as possible!

Here's wishing you all the happiness in the world! Lots of happiness & laughter, fun & frolic :) Happyyy birthdayy...you are one year older!! :) :)

May you achieve all that you desire, just continue with that dream wala funda and belive me you will achieve great heights! :)

Oh! ya..just to make you feel good about urself, continue reading I am sure you wont be disappointed...

Thanks for being there each and every time I feel totally gone and out!

Thanks for making me laugh...

Thanks for coming early and helping me out...

Thanks for sitting with me and assuring me that things hopefully will be ok :P

Thanks for all the 5star's...kitne hue? :P :)

yOu totally rOcK, you are the bEsT! :p...I tho was all set to sing the complete bday song for you, but well as luck would have it , my throat's in a mess.. *sad sigh*

P.S. yOu know who yOu are, don't you? :)

P.P.S. ....And my faith in aNgEls has only increased! :)

P.P.P.S. Your bestest joke till date, "tharkipana ka bhi level hota hai" OMG!! Dude, you are funny! :) Have a rocking bday, stay blessed!!

....And yes, I am hurt with your "senti" wala text!!! :P

Men will be Men!

2011-12-03T10:08:00.001-05:00

At the sandwich wala :

He : Can I ask your name?
She with a stern expression: I don't see the need to tell you my name.
He (Still trying): Your office is on the the 5th Floor?
She (disgusted) : So?
He: I work in XYX company, just adjacent to your's.
She to the sandwich wala : Kitna hua?

Pays him and walk off with a stern expression.

Just as she was entering the Lobby of her office building :

He: "Excuse me?"
She (confused and surpised) turns back to find herself staring into a stranger's face.
He: "You came via Kurla?"
She : Still confused
He: "I see you almost daily" with a smile.
She : "So? Excuse me, I am NOT interested.

Walks off, only convinced that the security is MEANT to allow people who DO NOT have company badges!!!!

When He met her for the first time :

"Had, I not been serious about HER, I would have really fallen for you"!!

**Go, get a life dude!! I mean seriously!!** WTH!

He to Her on the telephone :

"If I tell you, you are beautiful...you will think I am hitting on you"

Na, na - I won't think anything! This was cute, actually!! :)

The Selfish ME.

2011-11-22T02:09:00.001-05:00

While my Maa lay recuperating in the hospital post her eye surgery, I sat staring at my desktop at work cos I am serving the so called notice period and no leaves allowed. I, in no way want my LWD to be extended, since I am dying for time!! Tears rolled down my cheeks.

While my dad was in the kitchen preparing breakfast for himself and Maa on saturday morn, I slept away to glory.The tiring week and the antibiotics were showing its effect.

While my brother comes home late in the nite all tired and makes an omlette for himself, I am busy taking my shower and trying to read up on what was taught in class.

While my dad comes homes in the eve and prepares evening chai, I am busy running and praying that I make it on time for my class.

While my maa stays back all alone at home, I continue with my life!

Right you are Atul, I am selfish. Very, very selfish.

PS:The guilt is slowly killing me!

PPS: In need of some positive energy...

PPPS: You HAVE to read this one people : Maa has to wear black glasses post her surgery, when she put it on for the first time; I went like Mummy looks so HOT na papa?" My dad looked totallyyyyyy scandalised :P That's another story he is used to it now! And now more than often he says it himself and smiles, his killer smile! :)

Miserable.

2011-11-18T10:08:00.001-05:00

....And I keep repeating to myself, this phase shall also pass...

Worried.

2011-11-14T11:26:00.001-05:00

I am worried, really really worried!!

Hair loss is killing me sec by sec, day by day :( :(

Soultion anybody?!! **yells loudly**

PS: Damn the pollution!!!!!!!!!! :( :(

My passion.

2011-11-12T13:12:00.001-05:00

Amongst other things that I learnt today, I also relaised something which made me smile.

Today in class we were all asked "what's your passion?" The prof. went on to explain the difference between a "hobby" and "passion". Hobby being an activity that one does when they have time in hand and passion being the one for which one removes time.

Passion being something that helps someone vent their anger, frustation and calm down. Passion being something that somenone wishes and wants to even if the person is dead tired, because doing that one activity would rejuvenate the person. Passion is something that you do, no matter how busy your schedule is.

Writing, is my passion! :)

PS: Aaahhh the gododbye's .... :( :(!! I am at my emotional best as my last day at Q nears!

Cheers to us tooooo :) :) :)

2011-10-31T13:15:00.001-04:00

PS: This post is not the outcome of the gift, read fastrack watch that I was recently showered with.

PPS: This post is also not the outcome of that awesomely beautiful braclet that you gifted me.

PPPS: This post is certainly NOT the outcome of the awesome wallet that u gifted, the one that I carry and totally adore!! :)

So well, this post is all about the love that you have showered me with during such a short span of time. If I were to point out one particular event, the result of which is having you in my life then I would say that Town hall at Intercontinental - When, I lost in my own world was eating brownie and kept the spoon in a mouth a lil longer and aapka chalu hogaya - Look at her, licking!! :P Oh! God you are soo adorable!! Btw, it's my habbit to hold the spoon in my mouth a tad bit longer :P, so dearie I wasn't licking! :) And then started this wonderful journey of laughter, giggles, fun and frolic & masti :)

You know, what's the best part about you? It's the fact that you keep laughing, all the time. Touch wood, God bless you. I am sure you have your own set of worries, who doesn't have them but then you enjoy life and your laughter is so infectious. You spread happiness Kavita! :)

For you, life is Neinu and Manish! And that's sooo adorable!! I have come to love that Neil of your's sooo much na - but I am sure he detests me, especially after wat I did to him (I put my hand inside his shirt, I luv doing that with kids:) :D) Btw he is the crankiesttttt kid I have ever come across. Oh ya! And he is also the most adorable and above all the luckiest kiddo to have you as his mom! :) You think sooo much about your family members, difficult to find some one like you - so selfless, so giving in today's bad bad world! And yeah, you love showering people with gifts na? Hayyee, had I been in Q during Christmas I would have got another gift no? :)

You are undoubtedly one of the bestest things to have happened to me in Q! The best part about you - evertime I ping you for tea, every single time you come happily, unlike me who only but keeps cribbing kitna kaam hai kitna kaam hai! :P You heard me patiently whilst I cribbed about the entire comapctor activity!! :) And the bestest part is, you also don't like "her" *winks mischeviously* I love the way you feel ignored, when Parikshit & I go for walks in the afternoon :P I swear we never ignore you intentionally! :) We just cant! The funniest part being, you call up and while we are sitting down - You ask, kidhar ho (I m sure u very well know we r down:P) I reply neeche...and you go like, phir mujhe bunk kiya na, and hang up abruptly!! Oh! God how can someone manage to be sooo cute! Also, I love the expression when we both are talking about hero read Parikshit not being reacahable, and I go like he replied to my text and you go like...he never replies to mine! :D :)

Did I ever tell you, I am like a big fan of ur 1000 watt smile! And I also admire your dressing style, most of the time :) I was comfy abt EAD entire thingie, cos of you! And yeah, you made it a huge huge success - you are such an awesome dancer!!! * whistles and claps* And we all looked soo cute that day, cos u went all d way to bandra to get those stuff that we put in our hair and hands *wonders what they are called* Thanks, thanks - muaaaah!!

I love the rally of texts that we exchange on the way back to our respective homes, and finally I get ur text - I hve reached home, cooking time! And I go likee, mannn-- cos I wldnt have reached even half the distance by then :) I love the way, you feel horrible about the fact that Neinu is waiting for you and the way you feel guilty about it! It only shows how much that son of your's means to you! :) I know he loves you too! :)

I know what exactly you meant that monday morning when I was crying and you yelled " Don't do this on a monday morning, I hate this" in your irritated tone. I know you wanted me to share why I was crying and then you hugged me. Later back to our desks, you pinged me - dear are you ok?! God, I am gonna miss you like crazzyyyyy :(. I love to ping you exactly the same sec you log into your system, thanks to you being tagged by me! :) I love to see your vibrant smile every morning. it gives me a feeling, everything will be ok :)! I love the fact that you have spolit us crazy, me and Parikshit with gifts! :) and also the way you say aree kisi ko dikha mat!! And when I am happy, I want the world to know, and I do everything possible to let everyone I like know how awesome you are! :)

I am so gald, I got to know you! You are an angel and when you are appreciated, my heart blooms with pride! :) I loved the way, the other day you told me "you always are my cindrella". No guys has told me this as yet :P Oh! ya I also love the way, everytime I get senti, you say - chal paka mat :P

Dat's another story that you DON'T remember that I had hunted you down, just after a couple of days of joining Q to wish you happy bday - it was such a herculean task :P! **sad sigh** I guess, I forgive you for your bad memory, it happens with age! :P

You are like awesome rasied to infinity!! :D Here's wishing you all d sucess in life! God bless. I am gonna miss our pantry sessions :( :(

PS: You are one of the strongest woman,I kno - never mind the weight! :P :)

PPS: Bus don't say, jab dekho roti rehti hai, then me thinks me will like you MORE! :D Muahhhh- you totallyyy rockkk! :)

:) :) :)

2011-10-30T14:16:00.000-04:00

And I kept asking " Happiness thou art you?" Not realising it was just next, just next to me!! :) :)

I read the below mentioned lines somewhere and it HAD to feature on my blog!

How many times do you need to get hurt for you to know it's TIME to let go!! :)

Fall in love or fall in hate

Get inspired or get depressed

Ace a class or bunk a class

Make babies :) or make art

Speak the truth or lie and cheat

Dance on the tables or sit in the corner

Life is Divine chaos. Embrace it.

Forgive yourslef. Breathe...

And enjoy the ride!! :) :)

PS: God, aren't you just great?! Thanks sooo sooo much for everything!! :) :)

PSS: It's sunshine time pple, NO more sad posts happng!! :D :) :)

Aaahhh, the wait seems endlesssssss :P :)

Cheers to us!! :)

2011-10-29T11:15:00.000-04:00

.....And we became friends thanks to our frequent rounds to the pantry for tea/ coffee!! :)

My first impression of you - " What's this uncle doing here" :P Sorry for putting this on my blog - but well you now know me well enough now - I call a spade exactly that! :) And my next memories of you - You and Avi sitting in the pantry quietly and having breakfast! I used to find it sooo funny, cos neither of you spoke! :P

Then cos I stood up for what I felt was correct in my view, I was outcast....well literally! And then I started interacting with You, Atul, Gaurav, Avi! They say there is a reason behind everything, when I was outcast, I often wondered wat that reason could be. Now when I look back I get it all. It fits all perfectly just like the pieces of a puzzle, cos had I not been outcast; I wouldn't have ever, ever known you guys! And I am oh so glad that I started interacting with you all. And now as my last day in Q is nearing, I have this desperate wanting to spend each and every second at work with you and Kavita - As if wanting to just gather everything in my eyes and heart so that I can spend the rest of my life with all our wonderful memories at work! Jyada ho gaya kya? :P

Then started our serious talks over tea, what I did. What other's did...the same old story time and again! But it kind of got us closer :) And the bestest part of my stint in Q will be EAD!! I am glad you were my partner - God how much I yelled at you all through our practise sessions and the sweetheart that you are you would always make me smile at the end. By the way, hero you are an awesome dance and an entertainer :)! It was you alllll the way in EAD! I will never be able to thank you enough for patiently giving me tissue papers, while I have cried for God alone knows what all dumb reasons! And the funniest part is, you still don't know a couple of reasons - though you still keep irritating me wanting to get it out of me and I am sure u will continue doing it untill I rest peacefully in my grave. That's how long I want our friendship to continue for. That's how much you have come to mean to me. Ok, so to make you feel good about urself since you have been awesome to me here I list down somethings that will for sure make you smile -

For some funny reason you call me shaktiman, especially when I DEMAND you to do something for me; but I kind of like it :)

When you say " ok beta" - It only but makes me smile!

When you call up and say "Tea" - It's soooo funny, cos we are chatting on d communicator and then you call up :P....The funniest being you when you had walked up to Avi's desk, asked me my extn and dialed my no rite in front of my eyes. And oh! not just that but also forced me to answer the phone :)!!! (FYI pple - Avi's desk is adjacent to mine :P)

The rick rides - You, Me and Kavita :) God I am gonna cherish these memories for ages to come.

That day in Bandra when we checked every shop hunting for the skirts!!!! :P And Elco!! :)

The cutting chai office ke neeche :) Oh! btw you make it much better!! * whistles*

The walks that we go for at 3 din ko - When I feel soo damn sleepy :)

Believe me it was only cos of you and Kavita that I participated in EAD and ATUL but ofcourse!! :)

That lunch at Pop Tates... wow wat a time man!! :)

Walking to collect the prints don't seem much of a pain now, cos I wink at you every time I pass by! Or better still walk upto ur desk and realise you are just NOT working :) :P

Oh! btw I must let everyone know that YOU hero goofed up a step onstage! But neways I have forgiven you for that cos I had a BLAST!! :)

I felt so proud of you, when people were coming and complimenting you that day! :)

Latest ones being - We decide to come to work at 8 and then I ping you at 6.30 and say I am damn sleepy and you say So ja!! :P And we finally reach work not before 9.15 :) And our being in touch literally 24*7 :)

You came into my life when I was all alone and I will always be thankful to you for that :)

Thanks for just being there every single time I have wanted some one to listen to me without being judgemental.Thanks for coming and sitting next to me when you realized I was pissed cos u had been unreachable for the first half of EAD! :)Thanks Angel for holding my hand & guiding me everytime I have fallen, not literally :P

Thanks Parikshit! :)

PS: God bless you! You will go a loooooong way, of that I am sure! :)

PPS: OMG!! Am I at my emotional best considering the fact that I will b leaving my first ever work place real soon!!

I will miss it allllllllll :( :(

2011-10-27T13:57:00.002-04:00

I will miss ignoring that dumb watchman at the Office gate and walking past without showing my Qid! :D

I will miss looking up and smiling to myself as Parikshit walks to his desk early in the morning.

I will miss yelling "Kavita" the moment she enters office and passes through my desk.

I will miss walking upto Vivek in the mornings just to say " Good morning boss" and the endless cribbing that I do after that.

I will miss going for breakfast with Avi :(

I will miss pinging Vivek and Parikshit with the yawning wala smiley! Oh, btw it's one of my fav smiley and also the red angry wala is another fav!!

I will miss the tea sessions with Kavita & Parikshit. Damn I will miss them like crazzzyy! And also the awesome tea that Parikshit makes..:(

I will miss getting worked up at all lil issues and the endless cribbbingssss and pouring my heart out to Vivek!!!

I will miss that 11'o clock ka tea with Atul, Gaurav, Ruella and Sharon.

I will miss being all quiet when I am in my cubicle and being just myselff when I am with Kavita and Parikshit.

I will miss those gyaan sessions that are given by Atul over the Office communicator :P

I will miss that laughter of Sharon and Ruella.

I will miss seeing Roshan Ma'am run run through the Office corridor. I will miss her toffess :(

I will miss the compactor!!! OMG how much I cribbed whilst I was preapring for that audit!!!

I will miss aiming to leave at 5 in the eve and finally leaving at 6.30 :P

I will miss the glares of the driver of the office drop!! Oh God, he is sooo damn funny!!

I will miss walking upto the printer to collect the prints and cribing over them getting lost!

I will miss looking up and seeing Dr. Dixit :(. I wil miss him in general!

I will miss my LMs - Both Meghna and Amrapali...oh I will miss Anu too & Shweta too :(

I will miss replying to e-mails :(

I will miss my desk mannnnnn

I will miss Kavita's smile, that 1000 watt wala! :)

I will miss talking to Avi and getting NO response, cos she is glued onto her lappy 24*7 :P

I will miss Rehmat's loud comments!

I will miss pulling my CTLs leg and cribbing about the never given WWD!! :)

I will miss Fedora's "Good morning Khushboo" :)

I will miss just about everything related to the people whom I have come to love sooo sooo much!!

PS: But I also know that, the end of something is the beginning of another thing! :) I will take & keep with me all the good people and good things and DISCARD the rest who have given me nothing but tears and sadness!

PPS: I just realized I haven't mentioned about me missing my work! I don't mean to demean my hardwork for the past year and a half, but I guess after a point you realize this is it. And you wish to move on.I will forever be greatful to Q for giving me my first job, my first paycheck and such lovely people in my life!! :)

Such is life.

2011-10-25T11:51:00.002-04:00

If till a couple of days back, some one would have mentioned Palm Beach road - I would have felt my cheeks grow a shade of pink darker and felt my heart burst with happiness. Today it means just another road for me that leads to my home, just another road that I watch from my terrace as I sip coffee just as the winter is settling in. Today it means just another road, that I would love to drive my car on, provided my mommy and daddy dearest give me the permission.

If till yesterday, I would have heard the song Saibo and Te Amo play, I would have smiled to myself so much so that it would have lightened up a dark room. Today, they mean just another song to me. Just another song.

If till yesterday, someone would have asked me for an outing at Pizza hut - I would have blushed and blushed some more. Today Pizza hut means just another eatery that I have to explore when I visit B'lore next. Everytime I visit B'lore, my sis and I are like "chal na jaate hain Pizza hut" But then we are so happy with Toscano and Dominos that we never go to Pizza hut.

If till yesterday, Someone would have spoken about zoozoo -I would have felt like jumping with happiness. Today, it means just another cartoon to me that amuses me and brings a smile to my face.

If till yesterday, I would have walked past through landmark - I would have pictured me reading a book and....! Today, it means nothing but just another book store wherein I go hunting for Julie Garwood books. Aaahh!! why dont any book stores have them?!

You can shed tears that someone is gone, or you can smile cos they lived.

Your heart can be can be empty cos u can't see that someone, or you can be full of the love u shared.

You can hate or you can forgive and forget.

You can long for something, or you can feel blessed & thank God for all that he has given you.

You can cry & close ur mind, eyes and heart; feel empty, or you can smile open your eyes , mind and heart & love again.....move on!

I choose to do the latter part of each! :)

PS: Thanks Sangi, for sharing the above lines, I have given it a lil of my touch! :)

PPS: Can anyone get luckier than me? I just got a Fastrack watch for Diwali!! Muaaahhh Luv you soooo sooo much!! :) :) :) It's not the brand, nor the gift - just the thought process that has touched me sooo much. What would I do without you baby? :)

Thank you!

2011-10-24T12:01:00.000-04:00

I am sure you will be shocked, when you realise this post is for you! :)

But well....

Thank you for pinging me everytime I feel low, somehow you just ping at the rite moment :)

Thank you for listening to me patiently all the time (read my endless cribbing sessions :D )

Thank you for calming me down

Thank you for caring in your own way

Thank you Ibrahim for just being there :)

PS: I have no clue, how we came onto become friends. But I am glad, I got to know you! You have helped me sail smoothly through a very difficlut phase of my life, without even realising. I, will never be able to thank you enough for that!

PPS: It's awesome to have you around! I can ping you anytime cos I am confident you will listen patiently without being judgemental!

Thanks for calling today!!! God bless you :)

LET GO!

2011-10-23T04:35:00.002-04:00

.....And then when you realize holding onto it will take you absolutely no where, you must just let go.

LET GO!!

ANGELS!! :) :)

2011-10-20T11:54:00.004-04:00

....And then you just find ANGELS in your walk of life - they hold your hands tight, brighten up your life and make sure you are absoultely fine no matter how tough the going gets!!

Kavita and Parikshit - this one's for you both! Muuaahhh :) :)

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PS : You guys really have to mean a lot to me - that here I am writing this for you guys even though I am down with a cannot-be-worse-than-this-headache (for the second consecutive day) and soare throat that just refuses to go :) :)

PPS: More to follow soon :)

Someday....

2011-10-15T11:47:00.000-04:00

Someday I kno, I wil find someone who will love me for who I am

Someday I kno, I will find someone who will understand that stylish is anything and everything that I am comfortable and happy in

Someday I kno, I will find someone who will be able to handle the cotton that I am

Someday I kno, I will find someone who will uncomplicate me

Someday I kno, I will find someone who will treasure and cherish my very being

Some day I kno, I will find someone who will calm me with jus a whisper

Someday I kno, I wil find someone who will be willing to spend the rest of his life with me

Someday I kno, I will find someone who will not let a single tear roll down my cheek

Someday I kno, I will find someone whose hand will fit just perfect with mine

Someday I kno, I will find someone who will NOT be perfect but together we will build a perfect relationship

Someday I kno, I will find someone whose voice will make my heart skip a beat

Someday I kno, I will find someone whose care and affection will make my heart burst with happiness

Someday I kno, I will find someone whose smile will lighten up my day and life

Someday I kno I will find someone who will understand me even before I express myself

Someday I kno I will find someone who will LOVE me unconditionally!

Most of the time & sometimes

2011-10-12T12:57:00.000-04:00

Most of the time I am fine,

But sometimes, I feel lost….very very lost.

Most of the time I am happy

But sometimes, a tear rolls down my cheek

Most of the time I laugh

But sometimes, the laughter is nothing but a mere exercise for my lips and jaw.

Most of the time I like keeping myself busy

But sometimes, I just feel like sitting by myself and thinking…

Most of the time I pretend to be strong

But sometimes, I just break down!

Most of the time I like listening to songs

But sometimes, I keep changing them and finally stop listening all together.

Most of the time I like being surrounded by people

But sometimes, I feel lonely even though I have so many of them for company.

Most of the time I say to myself, “I am ok, I have to be ok”

But sometimes, I just don’t feel ok.

Most of the time I don’t feel like thinking at all

But sometimes, I just let all the memories gush in.

Most of the time I don't question

But sometimes I wonder, why?!

Most of the time I do get an answer

But sometimes, I yearn for more convincing answers.

A note!

2011-10-02T09:28:00.002-04:00

Dear Heart, Fall in love when you are READY and

NOT

when you are LONELY!

Disturbed.

2011-10-01T05:51:00.000-04:00

She looked at the indicator and heaved a sigh of relief. She was after all in time to board the train she wished to. She was nearing the staircase that would lead her to the platform. A second later, a moron touched her in a way no girl, woman/ lady would ever, ever want to be touched. Tears stung her eyes. In reflex she turned back and found herself staring into cannot be worse than this devil type eyes. She hit him hard, mindless of where she was actually wanting to hit that devil. In a second it was all over, cos he disappeared into thin air. She was now breathing heavily while the spectators continued to watch the show. She was just another target.

To all the girls/ ladies reading this - Please do not put up with physical abuse in any form. Give it back to the ***t***s there and then.

To all the guys/ men reading this - Please learn to keep your emotions in check whilst travelling. Remember, you are in this world cos a woman nurtured you in her womb for nine long months. Respect them.

rAnDoM tHoUgHtS

2011-09-10T11:30:00.000-04:00

You wait for love to happen all your life, and when it finally happens it leaves you with a broken heart and a broken you.

You give, and give and continue giving and when you have nothing else that can be given; you feel the emptiness.

Reading takes you into another world altogether, a world that in reality may never exist.Or it just might, if that someone is ready to build that world only for you.

Keeping yourself busy is the second best way to shun your thoughts, the first being reading.

The entire world wants to fall in love with you, but you want the love of that one person who perhaps may never love you as much as you wish to be loved.

The power of FAMILY can move mountains.

God keeps sending angels to help you wade through the tough situations in life.

I now understand what my mom meant, when she used to say "eldest sister's are like mothers,respect yours". Now, I do.

My guide and teacher, Dr. Kakowli Bose - always brings a smile to my face.

Your thoughts never leave you, now matter how much you wish to run away from them.

My SISTER'S = HAPPINESSSSSS :)

P.S. Missing my tea sessions with Kavita & Parikshit!! But, I am sure they aren't missing my endless cribbings :P :D

Notes from B'lore!

2011-09-09T07:00:00.000-04:00

Never felt so relaxed in a long long time! Bliss - that's how I feel. I don't know if its to do with B'lore or with the fact that I am with my sisters :) It's so funny that in Mum I crave to sleep and here I hav been up since 6.30 in the morning.Although I have been tired like crazy over the last few weeks or maybe the entire last month, but now I feel as fresh as ever and so awesome!

So well, yesterday was alonnng day, I left home at 6.10 in the morning (the fouth consecutive day) cos I had to wind lots of things at work, lots as in real wala lots! I managed to leave work at 4 and thought I was doing fine for a 5.40 flite. But well even after having told that dumb rick wala to take me to the "domestic airpot" that idiot fella took me to international airport.

Midway through, I realised and questioned him and he said "yeh internation nahin hai"

"Board dekho samne" I yellled.

"Hann to aapne kabhi domestic bola hi nahi" He replied.Notice the way he manages to make a fool out of himslef!

I stared at him and wanted to laugh at his stupidity and misery but well I was very busy getting all angry and riled up. So then he took a uturn and took me from god-alone-knows which all gulleys! All d time, I kept praying to reach on time for the flite, besides cursing that fool but ofcourse!

He spoke again"main aaapke liye no entry wale lane se jaraha hon"

I refused to even reply, my eyes glued to my watch.

Luckily I made it on time. The most bestest thing about travelling for me is checking out the book stores, so well I got myself a book - managed to find my fav author (after a long time - God bless landmark!) Had a quick sandwich, got some choc for a kiddo there:) and boarded the flite. And then I was all prepared and nervous for the take off and it just kept delaying until 6.10!! Anyways the flite was ok, expect the landing which happened with a loud thud and all the passengers faces went pale, mine being the first one! :P Only wen I thout I was ok and the aircraft was slowing down did we hear a loud noise - once and twice! I closed my eyes! I am sure it hit something, infact when we were all getting off, people actually went and were staring at the front portion of the aircraft - as if trying to figure out the damage!

So I walk out of the airport to see the hottest couple on earth waiting for me! Lots of hugs and kisses and smiles and and talks! :) One hour drive and we are home!I meet my other sis -some more kisses-hugs-laughter-smiles :)! Dinner- my sis had made all my fav -paneer, dahi vada (I just love the one made by her and only her, it's to die for!) and biryani -which I am nt really hot abt - bt it was awesome yet again!

We talk and talk some more , until I ask for a crocin cos my soare throat refuses to go! :( And then we sleep, a peaceful sleep in a long time.

Here, now I am up and the first thing I wanted to do when my eyes opened was see my mom! How funny it is, when I was in Mum - I wouldn't care much! That's human tendency.

Time for tea, that should help my throat a little! Stay blessed people!

PS: Happiness personified :)

Confused!

2011-09-04T13:06:00.002-04:00

Confused, that's how I feel now. Maybe it's the antibiotics showing it's effect! On a serious note, I have been disturbed for quite some time now, and I really dunno what's been bothering me. I just want to run away from everything, or maybe I don't. I havn't been recieving calls of a couple of close friends for quite sometime now, and if they read this I am gonna be dead for sure! But well, I really have been busy - first with Eid celebrations, lots of guests/ relatives and now with a horrible soare throat and a cannot-be-worse-than-this cranky mood! Oh! ya how can I forget the preparations for the audit that we face tomorrow, which has kept me busier than ever! So, Avani and Hari - I swear I haven't missed ur calls on purpose, it's just that the cell wasn't with me everytime you guys called up. My mistake is that I din return your calls, please gimme some time. I am glad I have been super duper busy at work, cos that hardly levaes me with anytime to think. At nite, I am oh so tired that I cry a little and just sleep off.

I am off now, have a long and tiring week ahead. Hopefully my next post is with some positive stuff and a not-so-confused me! Stay blesses people!

=================================================

PS: Angels, they continue to brighten me everysingle time I am down & out - Kavita, ain't I blesssssssed to have you around at work! :)

PPS: Kehne ko saath apne,

ek duniya chalti hai

par chupke is dil mein,

tanhai palti hai..

Lost...

2011-07-31T11:24:00.004-04:00

"What's the best part of your day" She asked.
I looked blankly at her " When I can be myself. That's possible only late in the nite when I turn off the lights & and touch the bed" Whispered I.
"Why?" She asked confused.
" I don't have to pretend that I am happy & smile all the time, just to evade questions. I let the warm tears roll down as I feel all cold inside". I smiled, my lower lip trembling.
"...And then I cry myslef to sleep" I finished.

========================================
Jab jab dard ka baadal chaya
Jab ghum ka saya lehraya
Jab aansoo palkon tak aya
Jab yeh tanha dil ghabraya

Humne dil ko yeh samjhaya
Dil aakhir tu kyun rota hai
Duniya mein yunhi hota hai

Yeh jo gehre sannate hain
Waqt ne sabko hi baante hain
Thoda ghum hai sabka qissa
Thodi dhoop hai sabka hissa
Aankh teri bekaar hi nam hai
Har pal ek naya mausam hai
Kyun tu aise pal khota hai
Dil aakhir tu kyun rota hai

-ZNMD

==========================================

Oh Angel!

2011-07-28T11:47:00.002-04:00

*************************************
You love &
You are loved.
You break a heart &
in the turn, have your's broken into bits & pieces.
*********************************************************************

I have always believed in the idea of "Angels". For me, they are soemone who walk into your life when the chips are low, or they are not low (at each and every phase, walk of your life); hold your hand tightly and help you sail. Later on, quietly they slip out of your life or disappear into thin air even before you can thank them.

Whilst returning home today, as Kurla station neared I stood at the door of the train compartment lost in my thoughts and suddenly everything just went balnk (nothing new with me :P). Before I could even realise, I hear a loud thud and well my umbrella that I had held in my hand a couple of seconds back had fallen on the platform. As the train still continued to move, before it halted at the station I turned back and saw a man pick my blue colored umbrella. I came back to my senses only when I got down and the first thing that come to my mind was to call either of my sister's and ask if I should go back and check if I could get my umbrella. But I bunked the idea and started walking back where I thougth I had dropped my umbrella. The platform looked comparatively empty now since the train was long gone. I walked and reached the end of the platfrom, but in no man's hand did I see my blue colored umbrella. Upset with myself, I was about to turn and take the staircase when I saw an old man call me. Initially hesitant, I still walked towards him and he asked "Umbrella?". I nodded with expactant eyes. He pointed towards a chair and I saw a balck colored umbrella next to a man. I looked at the old man, my eyes filled with confusion and he pointed towards a pillar, where my umbrella lay neatly tucked. " Thank you very much uncle" I smiled.

Today, I came accross yet another angel! :)

Happpyyy happpyyyy happyyy bIrThDaY!! :)

2011-07-24T13:17:00.003-04:00

So, if today you see me thanking the cashier at the mall and referring to them either as "sir" or "madam" - it's only cos I learnt it from U!
If today you see me writing and speaking well, it's cos I picked up the reading habbit from U!!
If today you see me wearing that awesomely awesome pink, black, red - infact any churidaar its cos u gifted them to me!
If today you see me wearing that supercool bracelet and that supercomfy slip ons - it's cos you sent them to me! :)
If today I am confident about my email etiquette - it's cos U have guided me and I have learnt all of it from U!!

My so many firsts have been cos of you, rem...?
My first air travel ALONE - to B'lore.
My first bank account.
My first interview - rem, rem?? OMG!!! :D :)
The first time I had tiramisu - I hated it, that's another story I LOVE it now!
My Fist Hidesign hand bag :)
How can I forget, my first Laptop!!! :)
My first heels, after ages - at UR wedding!
My first visit to the parlor - again cs of ur wedding!

And it's your birthday today, high time you realise you are getting OLD!!! In the comment please do mention the number of candles that you put on your cake!! :) On a serious note, I want to be the FIRST person to wish U! I have learnt soooo much from, apart from the tables ofcourse! Yep, I mean the mathematical tables - so pple the story goes like, wen we were kids and would not keep our rooms clean amongst other stuff - we were punished and told to write tables 2-20; like 10 times or 20 times by OUR sisssy dearest!! And to think of it we actually did!! So well, if I know my tables by heart it's again cos of U sweetheart!

You are one of the strongest woman, I kno and I am sooo very proud of U! And I love U not cos of ur habit of showering us with gifts rite since ur UK days, but bcos ur presence in my life means soooo much!! The bestest part is our telepathy - every single time I am low, down, or crying beleive it or not my cell rings and it's U calling! When we were kids and I would fight with U, maa would always say - eldest sisters are like second mom; I have only come to understand wat she meant in the last couple of years! :)

I kno, if tomorrow I take a decision that Mum and Dad are not haapy with, U will still support me.What I cherish the most about you, hmmmm lemme see-
Our early morning talks - they really brighten up my day....everysingle day!
All our numerous calls through the day - they make me smile :)
Your laughter, that actual wala - Oh Gosh, I can roll on the floorrrrrr!! :D
Everysingle time I sleep in UR arms, U kno na how much I love it :)
The way U charge me up, everysingle time I feel I am fit for nothing types.

U are the awesomest SIS neone could have!I love you sooo sooo much!!

I feel horrible about the fact that I am not there in B'lore on your b'day :( - But I shall be there soon!! :) And then we shall rock! Mr. Prince was all set to book my tickets, but well eventually, he didn't- so well you know whom to blame!! :D :P

I love the fact that -
You can carry urself awesomely well in flat and the most pointed hell!! I am the most clumsy girl around!! :(
You manage to look soooo HOT in a churidaar, denims and sarees! let the secret out baby! :D
You go crazzzyyyy over desserts!!
You love ur mithu mithi soooo much! - I still m shit scared of them! :(
We laugh over "DON" :D :)
Everytime I am low, you say "B'lore aaja"!! As if it"s jus like a min away from home!!
You get super excited when I am apprecaited in any way!
You are happy cos I am happy!
By my "hello", you know what's bothering me! :)
You drive soooo wel!! :)
You have come a Loooonnnngg way!! :) And I m sooo soooo proud of you!
We laugh at Gaazi.... :P :)
Every time you go to get urself something, first u buy things for me! Could anyone get luckier! :)

I guess ab bas hua! I can't lie further, so bbye!

Have a blast and stay blessed!!

**************************************************************

PS: This is my first post from my swanky new desktop!!! Yep, since its my Sister's bday, I gifted myself a Dell desktop!! :D :P

PPS: Gazzzziiiii, don't get angry!! I love you toooo!! :)

Just like that!

2011-07-23T05:44:00.003-04:00

“You must know… surely, you must know it was all for you…If your feelings are still what they were last April, tell me so at once. My affections and wishes have not changed, but one word from you will silence me forever. If, however, your feelings have changed, I will have to tell you: you have bewitched me, body and soul, and I love, I love, I love you. I never wish to be parted from you from this day on.”

–Darcy, Pride and Prejudice

“So it’s not gonna be easy. It’s gonna be really hard. We’re gonna have to work at this every day, but I want to do that because I want you. I want all of you, forever, you and me, every day.”
–Noah, The Notebook

“I’ve got ten bucks in my pocket, I have no-nothing to offer you and I know that. I understand. But I’m too involved now. You jump, I jump, remember?”

–Jack, Titanic

“I hate the way you talk to me, and the way you cut your hair. I hate the way you drive my car. I hate it when you stare. I hate your big dumb combat boots, and the way you read my mind. I hate you so much it makes me sick; it even makes me rhyme. I hate it, I hate the way you’re always right. I hate it when you lie. I hate it when you make me laugh, even worse when you make me cry. I hate it when you’re not around, and the fact that you didn’t call. But mostly I hate the way I don’t hate you. Not even close, not even a little bit, not even at all.”

–Kat, 10 Things I Hate About You

*************************************************************

PS: I feel the unrest..
that nest all hollowness..
for i have nowhere to go and im cold..

And i feel so lonely yea..
There's a better place from this emptiness..
And i’m so lonely yea..
There's a better place from this emptiness..

My first rains wala post!!

2011-06-26T03:07:00.009-04:00

....And then we make silent love, as it rains heavily .....

......And my heart sheds unseen tears as I watch the raindrops slide by my window pane!

*******************************************************

PS: Oh boy! I am back here after a looong loongg time!! Not that I was missed badly, but well I certainly did miss blogging, real badddd! The 'just not wanting to go away wala' neck and spine pain has been the reason for me not writing and also the reason for this small post of mine!

PSS: I had thought of these two phrases quite sometime back, but was just waiting for the rains so that I could post it with feelings et all, know what I mean people? :P

So anyways :), the week that it was raining I was on complete bed rest and from the week that I resumed my daily chores, it just hasn't been raining and then now I am like oohh so tired of waiting for the rains to get that "real rain wala feeling" and then post these phrases... that I decided to post it anyways!!

PSSS: Pray, I get rid of this pain real quick people; so that you can read more of me! Even if you don't wish to read more of me, please still pray! :P :)

Happy Birthday Hari!!

2011-05-23T10:49:00.005-04:00

It was almost 2 years back you gave me a call just out of the blue. I still remember I was in the kitchen making tea and my home was in a mess cause of renovation work going on. It took me a moment to understand who was on line since you identified yourself as Hari. Not once had I called you by this name during our entire schooling days! Then I took my cup of tea and went on the terrace, it looked like it would pour at any moment. We just clicked immediately and spoke at length about nothing constructive, but it was awesome!! Then what followed were long calls and endless texts..:)

You came in my life at a time, when I needed someone so desperately for I was going through the worst ever phase in my life and you presence made it just so easy! Then we decided to meet up, and your text “Don’t bunk me now, m on my way” still makes me smile! :)

You were this awesome support all through those days when I would crib endlessly about when my results would be out and then they finally they were declared – you were one of my first friends I spoke to after my family- that’s how important you have come to mean to me! And then those days when I would whine uncontrollably about the job that I so wanted! You truly are special for reasons galore!

You are this awesome friend I have! Though you are a man of few words, you still ROCK!! Today on your birthday – I wish you a very long and healthy life and also wish that you get your girl real soon. At least one of us will be happy *sad sigh* :D :P

Stay blessed!

**********************************************************

PS1: You are the motivation; behind me having tea and coffee sans sugar!! :) I admire you for who you are & all that you have achieved!! :) :)

PS2: You are the reason that this blog of mine exists today and also the fact that I on on FB. Remember how much I had irriated you regarding both of them, but I am glad I did what you told...both FB and my blog have given me a lot in LIFE :) :)....and I owe it all to you!! Will I ever be able to thank you enough...?!

PS3: Ever plugged in the headfones and put on the music player on the highest voulme to just shun all the thoughts running through your head?

**********************************************************

Making love out of nothing at all....

2011-05-21T12:52:00.002-04:00

I know just how to whisper
And I know just how to cry
I know just where I find the answers
And I know just how to lie
I know just how to fake it
And I know just how to scheme
I know just when to face the truth
And then I know just when to dream
And I know just where I touch you
And I know just what to prove
I know when to pull you closer
And I know when to let you loose

And I know the night is fading
And I know the time's gonna fly
And I'm never gonna tell you everything I gotta tell you
But I know I've got to give it a try

And I know the roads to riches
And I know the ways to pain
I know all the rules and then I know how to break 'em
And then I always know the name of the game

But I don't know how to leave you
And I'll never let you fall
And I don't know how you do it
Making love out of nothing at all

Making love
Out of nothing at all
Making love
Out of nothing at all
Making love
Out of nothing at all
Making love
Out of nothing at all
Making love
Out of nothing at all
Making love
Out of nothing at all

Everytime I see you, well the rays of the sun are all
Streaming through the waves in your hair
And every star in the sky is taking aim at your eyes
Like a spotlight
The beating of my heart is a drum and it's lost
And it's looking for a rhythm like you
You can take the darkness from the deep of the night
And turn it to a beacon burning endlessly bright
I gotta follow it's cause everything I know
Well, it's nothing till I give it to you

I can make the runner stumble
I can make the final block
And I can make every tackle at the sound of the whistle
And I can make all the stadiums rock

I can make tonight forever
Or I can make it disappear by the dawn
And I can make you every promise that's ever been made
And I can make all your demons be gone

But I'm never gonna make it without you
Do you really wanna see me crawl ?
And I'm never gonna make it like you do
Making love out of nothing at all

Making love
Out of nothing at all...

********************************************************

PS1 : This one is NOT by me !!!

PS2: Feeling horribly down and low, oh am I just down with a heat stroke ?!! :( :(

PS3: How can people come up with a remix for a song like Saibo??!! Nevermind, it doesn't feel the same ne more, so I guess it's ok!!!

i HATE you!!!!!

2011-05-18T11:38:00.004-04:00

Believe me I hate you right from the bottom of my heart. You are just so addictive and you feel real happy about it, don't you?! I have hated you ever since I got to know of your existence. The site and thought of you makes me go all yuck.It's all your plan isn't it? To first give people just a lil exposure of you and then well slowly with time people do get addicted to you and how!! *eyes full of hatred*

Obviously, with you around things seem perfectly fine for the moment. But when reality dawns things get only worse! And hello your sister is no better - You all are same, JUST the same!! You KILL. You siblings are like slow poison - slowly and steadily you kill with so much pain.People thing that you help them run away from their worries and thoughts, little do they realise your hidden intention.Yes you do give this moment of pure bliss, but this is short lived.

Only if I could tell people about your intentions and save them all.Never mind better late than never, at least the chosen few, who do follow my blog would now be aware and decide for themselves.

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PS1: I really do hate you - Cigarette and your sister - all you alcoholic drinks! They KILL - All my dear friends reading this post of mine - Please QUIT drinking and smoking!! *pleading eyes*

PS2: Ok so well, many would argue that drinking and smoking occasionally is absolutely fine.But well - this is MY blog so I write my thoughts. To each his own.Period.

PS3: tera naam maine liya hai yahan
mujhe yaad tune kiya hai wahan...

tHe bReAk uP

2011-05-14T12:15:00.005-04:00

He called for the cheque, just as another lightning hit the city of Mumbai. He could see her strained features and her upset eyes in that flash of a second. He covered her hand with his to calm her down exactly the same way he had done during the rainy season last year. Only when he realized she had ceased shivering did he remove his hand from her's, he still found her habit of getting paranoid by thundering and lightning mindblowingly adorable and cute - he smiled.

She stared blankly at the full sized window pane of the restaurant that they sat in, the rains were only getting worse by the second.

"Ready to go sweetheart?" He asked and smiled.
She couldn't help but feel weak in her knees.She nodded.

They swiftly made their way out to the parking area and within another minute were heading towards what had been their nest for the last one year.
She closed her eyes just when another lightning struck. He put his hand on her knees,smilingly she entwined her hands with his - he gave her hand a hard squeeze.She didn't open here eyes all through the way, he would glance at her almost after ever minute.He parked the car, she was frantically hunting for the house keys in the lift - he just looked at her confused expression and wondered - how did I come to love this girl so much. They reached the 16th floor and she looked at him all sad and worried -

"Did I leave the keys on the table?"
"Here they are sweetheart" He removed them from his pocket and smiled at her lovingly.
He opened the door, they walked in.
She switched on the lights and went to the kitchen to get coffee for the two of them. While she stood near the gas, waiting for the milk to boil he came up behind her and held her by the waist and rested his chin on her head. In a second, she was breathless.

"I, I ...need to get the sugar from that stand" She whispered.
He didn't let go off her. She stopped fighting and switched off the gas. He turned her towards him just as a tear rolled down her cheek.He touched his forehead to her's not letting go of her waist.

"Please, don't make it more difficult" She pleaded.
"I will miss you" He whispered in his husky tone.
After another second of holding her, he let go of her waist and made his way to the dining area and sat on the chair.

She calmed her wild heartbeat, made the coffee, poured it in their favourite coffee mugs and put them on the table.They sipped the coffee silently.The rain had stopped now.

"Leave tomorrow morning?" He asked, his eyes pleading.
She didn't react but focused on cleaning her drawer. A key chain brought a smile to her face.
"Hey, remember this?" She squealed with happiness.
He smiled at her and nodded - it had been his first gift to her.
She tossed it in her suitcase.Next came a couple of important papers, and loads of photographs.The keys for the new house, her new house was put in her hand bag.She closed the empty drawer.

"All set to leave?" He asked.
She nodded this time.
"I can't find my car keys" She declared after a having checked her hand bag for the second time.

"It's almost nearing 2, sweetheart leave tomorrow early morning.....hmmm??
"ummmm, 6 in the morning sounds good" She smiled.

They both hardly slept that night, he held her as tight as he could.The alarm was set for 5.00. At around 4.45 - his hands touched her cheeks, she hid her face in the crook of his neck.

"You will be fine baby" He assured her.
She shook her head, not letting go of him.

Slowly she loosened her grip and tried to get out of bed. He wouldn't let her.
"Please....." She cried.
He let go off her immediately.

She showered quickly and by the time she was ready, he had dressed up as well and was busy preparing tea.

They had their breakfast quietly, neither uttering a single word.
Finally he asked very well aware of the answer -
"Did you get your car keys?"
"They were in my handbag only" She smiled at him.
He smiled back.

When breakfast was over, she washed the dishes while he stood at the kitchen door staring at her controlling his urge of going her holding her. Once done she wiped her hands dry and smiled at him.

"Drop me down?" She asked water filling up her big black eyes.
"of course sweetheart" He whispered.

He picked up her two bags and walked towards the lift. She stepped out of their home, now his and stared at it for one long minute sighed and told herself - time to move on.

He put her bags in her car while she opened the door of the car.He came and stood in front of her.
"So? This is it huh?" He asked.
"Yeah!"
He bent his head and kissed her lightly on her lips.She shivered.
"I better get going" She told him.

She slid into the driver's seat and started the car, whilst he stood there staring at her as her car started moving away from his visibility, him, his life..

"All the best, may God bless you" He whispered.
"All the very best, may God bless you always" She whispered and looked at the road ahead.

He got back home and stared out of his window, reflecting back on the wonderful relationship that they had shared.He didn't believe in the concept of marriage, she couldn't stay without getting married...

The sun was only rising....

PS1: Is moving on in life so easy?!

PS2: I got a nice lecture from my sis who btw is the first one to read most of my drafts - for writing sad stuff et all alllll the time...so well my next one is gonna be a happy wala ending post!! :)

There was some technichal problem with my blog and a couple of my comments got deleted, feel horrible about it..:( :(

PS3:Kisi ko apna banake chhod de
aisa koi nahin karta....

mY mOtHeR's dAy pOsT...:)

2011-05-08T10:15:00.001-04:00

Before we shifted to Mumbai like 20-22 years back, we lived in this place called Dhanbad in Bihar. We had like a bunglaow and a huge verandaah attached to it. As a kid I would never go out and play with my siblings or friends because I was scared that the dog would come and bite my Amma.That's how silly I was back then.I wouldn't leave her for a sinlge second. 24 (25?) years later also I am worried/paranoid about her safety and about the fact that she lives alone all most all through the day once the maid leaves at around 1.00 PM I understand.

My MAA has played the most important role in my life for she carried me in her womb for nine long months that I am here dedicating this post to her.I am sure her happiness would have known no bounds when she would have seen me for the first time, held me in her arms for the first time, seen me take the first ever step in life, seen me run, readided me for playschool, then Primary, Secondary, College, my first salwar kameez, my first saree, my first job, my first salary, my first bonus, and now well she dreams of me being a bride real soon - well Maa that's not happening for quite sometime so please relax!!

I used to throw a lot of tantrums as a kid, ummm I still do. But to put me in place one fine evening my parents informed me that I am not their daughter and that if I misbehaved even once they would take me and leave me with my actual mother whom they referred to as buddhiya "Old woman". That nite I never slept, infact I cried myself to sleep.In my dreams I visualised how my actual mother would be like and all I could see was my Maa's face.After that I obviously was assured that I am their very own daughter, but I still feel sacred at time. I can't come to imagine someone else being my maa but this lady back home who showers me with unconditional love. My family members still joke with me over this, and every simgle time even now my face pales. The other day at the dinning table, my sis goes like "Papa, Khush still feels that she is that Buddhiya's daughter". As expected tears filled my eyes, I looked only in my plate.My dad goes like "Aare beta,you still think about it? We were only kidding and joking bacche." He laughed and put his hand on my head. My maa sat at the rocking chair smiling.

During exams be it in School or college - my mom never forced either of us to study even once. Infact she would be like - how much you will study go n sleep.When in school everytime we would tell her to wake us up at 2.00 or 3.00 in th nite she would be in our room before that and lovingly wake us up. By the time we would be up and the table with books et al tea/coffee would be ready. She would never leav us and go to her room - instead she would stay put with us night after night.How can some one be soo selfless and soo giving? As I grew up, I would get up by myself and if not she would never wake me up. And then when I would wake up all paranoid she would be like - sleep is also important. Everytime I would tell her I am bored to go to college she would be like take a leave, she still does that the only diferrence is that office has replaced college now.:)

I share this awesomely rocking bond with my mommy for she knows when exactly I need my space and when eaxctly I need her lap. I can talk to her about everything under the sun, right from the fact who amongst my friend's are dating and that well it's high time I get a guy for myself and even the fact that what is she doing - it's high time she hunts someone from me. It's only cos of her that I am the lady that I am today.She has held me while I have cried endlessly over my results, fretted over innumerable fights that I had with my friends, while I was sick. Just her mere presence has helped me sail through the worst phases of my life with ease.Way back in School when I had my first ever crush in life - she knew exactly what was happening coz I used to be on the phone the moment I would get back from school, but not once did she question me. All she would do was give her mischievous smile - maybe cos she was so damn sure of her upbringing that she knew I would never go worng or cross my boundaries.

There was a phase like 3-4 years back when I was very ill, my mom would stay up through the nites and be just next to me consoling while I would throw up almost everysingle day atleast twice-thrice and faint at the drop of a hat.I would keep telling her to go away, cos to see someone puke is not all that great a sight but she would be right there horrified but still stong and give me the assurance that I would be fine.

Last year I was home for almost 7-8 months doing nothing but being maha depressed over not getting a job and other stuff, she would always say - You will not get anythinh more or anything less than what's destined and you will get it at the rite time. God is watching, be patient. And she would pray endlessly for me. I thank her for the job that I am in today.I would love the tea times with her - we would just sit with our cup of tea and talk and talk about everything possible. I miss those days...

I am so glad that we had the rules and regulations back then, well we still do *sigh* like we were not allowed to stay out late nite, overnite stay at friend's place - a STRICT NO (it still is! ). I never understud the reasons back then, now I do and I so agree with them. Being friend's with guys was never an issue with either maa or papa, guy friend's would come home and call up - they were absolutely fine with it, they still are. Maybe that's why I never had the urge to do anything behind their back.

I love it when my mommy dearest is happy with her nightgown [oh! she has them in all shades of colors possible! :)], her newly renovated bedroom and yeah how can I forget the new AC, her kitchen, her husband and her kids. Her day begins with sending us all to work and ends with putting us all to bed.I love it when I am all ready to go to work and she looks at me and smiles and says - you are looking very cute. I love it when after a hard day at work I am locked in my room, she knocks and gives me fruits.I love to see her horribly horribly shocked expression everysingle time we siblings get pricey stuff for her. I love to see her content and happy everytime we go out for family dinners. The only reason I enter the kitchen and do some work is to make her smile and well make her realise I will surley not bring shame to her and daddy's name after I am married!!! I love to pamper her as much as I can. I love to see her blush, everysingle time we tease her with dad's name :)! I love to see the expression whenever I announce that she loves my brother more than me!I love to see her smile when I tell her, only if you don't pamper me as much as you are pampering Di after her marriage. I love to talk to her over the phone before everything important that I do - her voice gives me the assurance I will be fine.I love it when she give me garam garam kheer cos she knows that's how I like it. I love it when everytime I get flat and comfy footwear for me and she goes like -you should have taken 2 more of the same one, you hardly get good stuff that suit your feet :). I love it when maa feeds me food, food tastes ten times better! I love it when she asks me -how come you have not had a single fling till now and that is there not even a single guy at work who is good and whom you like.I love it when eversingle time I wear dark kajal in my eyes she smlies approvingly.

True Meano :) - A single day is not enough to celebrate what mother's have done and continue to do for us, but yeah maybe on this day we can atleast let them know that they mean the world to us and that we undersatnd and appreciate all that they have sacrificed for us.

I wish my MOMMY all the happiness in this world and hope and pray that she has a LONG and HEALTHY Life.I hope to make her happy in whichever small way I can.

PS1: It's not a joke to come from a small town, bear four kids and tranform them into good human beings. Maa - I am what I am only cause of you. You have come a LONG way and I am proud of you!!

PS2: The purest relation is the one shared between a mom and her child. I know I have NOT been the best daughter and that I have upset my MOM a thousand times - believ me I am really sorry. I love you Amma.

PS3:Main Kabhi Batlata Nahin
Par Andhere Se Darta Hoon Main Maa
Yun To Main,Dikhlata Nahin
Teri Parwaah Karta Hoon Main Maa
Tujhe Sab Hain Pata, Hain Na Maa
Tujhe Sab Hain Pata,Meri Maa

bIrThDaY tImE...

2011-04-28T11:48:00.005-04:00

My dearest SISTER will add another candle to her cake on the 29th Apr 2011 ...yay yay. So well Gaazi, here's wishing you all the happiness in the world. Ummm not just happpiness but also joys, laughters, calories and all the good things in life. You are the bestest sis I could have asked for - lady, you ROCK!!

I agree you are like horribly irritating at times, but hell ain't I a lil more irritating than you? :)

Your smile is to die for and you are this angel who brightens up my darkest days. I love you sooo sooo much. You have stood by me through my worst days and tolerated my oh not so needed mood swings - Thanks a ton for that.

You have held me while I have cried over the silliest things in life and laughed only cause you saw I was happy. Every single time you fall sick, I am like half dead- so better take care of yourself you fool - Your LIFE is sooo precious!!

May God bless you with a lil more weight!! :)

PS1: People who don't kno how to pronounce "Gaazi" kindly call her Ghazala - DO NOT mess around with her pet name!! *stares right into the eye*

PS2: Please DO not get bogged down by people and situations around you - enjoy life to the fullest and when ever you are low - always remeber how much mommy, daddy and we all love you and we HATE to see you upset and crying! So smile pls..:)

PS3: Atleast comment on this post of mine Gaazi..:P Love you sis!! Stay blessed! :)

oVeRwHeLmEd....

2011-04-18T13:09:00.009-04:00

I am tired, but I still ain't tired. Wierd & funny, that's how I feel from within. But I am happy, like the real wala happy - overwhelmed would be the apt word. Though I was like super duper tnesed at work and worried if I would even make it in time for Roshnee's Bday -it all just turned out to be purrrfect!! I had a rocking time at Roshnee's bday party and she looked oh so adorable :)

**************************************

I am so happy tonite

You for sure made my evening bright

Oh! for you what should I write

time passed like the speed of light....

****************************************

PS : For the first time today in the last one year that I have been travelling to Andheri daily for work - I felt I stay oh so close by, time just flew no?! :)

PSS : Thank you! :)

PSS : Kuch bhi jo accha lage

Aur mile bhi

Zaroori tho nahin

sach hai par

hai ajeeb....:) :)

sUpEr DuPeR sPlEnDiD tHiNgS...

2011-04-16T12:34:00.008-04:00

1. That one long lost song that you always loved, playing on the FM early in the morn or late in the nite...ummmm late in the nite is better, wot say u??! :) :D

2. When you touch the bed to dose off after that never ending long tiring day!

3. When you manage to board the train you wanted to!! Believe me the feeling is rocking!

4. A smile from some one least expected.

5. Greeting cards :) :), have they lost their importance in today's fast paced world? :(

6. That old photograph pulled out from your drawer and you go like awwwww...

7. Finding money in the innermost zipper of ypur handbag or jeans pockets! (not purse:P)

8. Talking on the phone about just NOTHING, and still experiencing the feeling of bliss.

9. Switching on the fan on the coldest nite ever and burryinng yourself under the blanket.

10. Walking on the sand barefoot.

11. Bookmarks :) :)

12. A sunny day during the rainy season.

13. Staying silent on the phone just for a couple of minutes and then asking each other what was this occured silence for?!..:) (My latest HOT fav) .

14. A soft pillow (100% feather wala, highly recommended :))

15. Appreciation for a job well done.

16. Crackle and mango bite ( There also was mango mood as well, anyone?)

17. To have finally sneezed, after it having irritated u for quite sometime.

18. Laughing till your stomach hurts and your eyes water or till you get that horrible cramp in your tummy.

19. Running on the beach with you hair open.

20. Waking up and realsing that well you can sleep for another couple of minutes.(My all time HOT fav)

21. Just staying by yourself on those off days.

22. Dreaming.

23. Late nite calls that last for hours...ummm hmmm or maybe just calls that last for hours...:)

24. When you go shopping and get what you wanted just in one go that saves you from roaming around and well you can come home fasstttt...(I HATE shopping!!)

25. Sleeping peacefully without waking up in the middle of the nite.

26. Complimets!! *blush* *blush*

27. When some one remembers you even tho you met that person for a very short span of time.

28. Laughing your heart out at the same joke that you laughed at 3-4 yrs back.

29. Zoozoo & Shin Chan.

30. Every single time I think abt my stint at ACTREC, my Ma'am and her daughter! :) :)

31. Kiss on the forehead.

32. A pat on the cheeks from my dad.

33. A gift at work :D :D :)

34. Scannig your wardrobe after you have just neatly placed all your clothes :)

35. CCD :)

36. Texting, texting and texting some more and you hardly reply! :(

37. The sight of a baby giggling and laughing :)

38. Tiramisu.

39. Change (ya ya cash wala, I love wen I get them - from my mum, dad, bro, sis, my drawer just abt anyone and anywhere )

40. Getting myself a novel with my hard earned money.

41. Early morning talks with my sis dearest, and pple at work think I am talking 2 my guy!! Dream on ppl, I m not letting the secret out!

42. The dessert at Pizza hut, rem?? :)

43. Going through my thesis again and again and yet again, I feel so proud of it!!

44. Dreaming about the library that I am gonna own real, real soon!!

45. Saying "pakka" and expecting and waiting for "promise"! :)

47. Coming home early from work.

48. The grin on my mom's face every single time I complete some kitchen chore!

49. Te amo, mi te amo...late in the nite! :)

50. Goa, can someone please buy me a house there??? Plesae...

51. Some one caling you, exactly at the same moment you happen to think about them.

52. To love someone to death.

53. Listening to that HOT new fav song of your's back to back.

54. That subtle laughter :) (My recent HOT fav)

55. When some one who matters says, "I TRUST you".

56. The new airtel ka 3G wala add!! Oh God it's like real real awesome man!! The girl, her expression and the guy and oh that background music....OMG, me just can't seem to get enough of it.

57. Some one holding your hand.

58. Travelling alone...wow!! Just love it.

59. Pizza and pasta at Toscano! :)

60. NOT being clumsy at the dinning table!! :D

61. A text from you, wen least expected !! :)

PS: Kabhi lage mili nahin, tumse main khwaboon mein bhi

Kabhi lage, kahin tho hai rishta koi

Kabhi lage chhun tumhein, yunhi khayalon me hi

Kabhi lage, nahin nahin chori nahin

Te amo, mi te amo

tu pass hai par door hai

Te amo, mii te amo

Jaata nahin yeh noor hai...

PSS : I am HAPPY. A lot to look forward to in the coming week - A frnd's bday, another frnd's reception party, Roshnee's bady party :), my office ka visit, maybe my physio ka appointment and yeah lots and lots of work at office - but I ain't complaining, atleast not here!!! :D :D

Just another day, in the life of ME...

2011-04-14T11:28:00.010-04:00

The day started with this nagging headache at 6.00 in the morning, so I chose to sleep for another hour. Ahhh that was bliss :). Luckily, didn't get any traffic cos of Ambedkar Jayanti (I guess that's the one) today, so was more than glad to reach work 15 minutes early tham my usual timing!! :)

The day was going ok, till well I got my zoozoo key chain!!! Thank you, you are a gem :), ya ya you truly are!! FYI- I have put it around my access card, and it looks adorable! :) I was super duper busy today with hardly any time to spare, but yeah I am happy. Real, real happy!! :)

Is it because I have stopped caring about people around me. Or is it bcos, I have the most rocking CTLs. ummm or is it cos of YOU?! Or maybe cos of the zoozoo that I got today. On second thoughts maybe cos, we will be going out for family dinner in sometime and well I intend to have sizzlers for sure and virgin mojito to go wid it and end it in a grand, grand way with tiramisu!! :) Or maybe cause I have learnt to be happy by myself and with what I have. Or maybe cos I got no traffic today and got a window seat in the morning in a 332, yeah u heard it rite window seat! :)

Or maybe cos, a PG friend just texted me saying that the external examiner who had visited our college for the final exams (MSc) still remebers me - even after almost 2 years !! And well not jus remembers me, but she told this friend of mine that she remembers me as a bright student!! yipeeee...*bows in front of the crowd and accepts the congratulatory msgs!!* :)

I know, nothing great I blogged about...but I had this super duper urge to share the fact that I am HAPPY!! :)

So, all I am waiting now is for my dad to get back from his parayers and out we all go!

PS: It's my dearest daddy's bday today!! So here's wishing him all the happiness in the world. Bestest health ever and loads and loads of smiles and bundles of joy!God bless you papa!!

PSS: Teri meri teri meri kahaani

Ek daastan nayi purani

Chori chori yeh kahani chali hai

Theheri thi jo tere aa jaane tak

Tere aane se maine jaana

ke Har safar ho gaya suhana

And I dont know why

But I feel good

PSSS: Maybe I don't have the perfect life that I ideally would have wanted, but hell I am ok. Infact, I am more tha ok with a few rocking friends who make my life oh so beautiful and the bestest family anyone could ever ask for!! :)

My Daddy - My LIFE!! :)

2011-04-04T12:54:00.004-04:00

That night when I breathed my first

the nurse thought you and mum were cursed

to have had a girl child for the third time in a row

you took me in your arms and whispered the sweetest hello!

It was raining cats & dogs and the electricity was gone

You sat through the nite and held me till dawn

You gave me wartmth and the glint in your eyes gave my life light

and in my tiny ears dua you did recite.

You sat me on your lap and taught me to write

and on the cold cold nights held me tight.

At the kindergarden gate, everytime you told me a bye

All I wished to do was sit and cry!!

You stood proud during my schooling days

and now I wonder how soon passed that phase!!

Your assurance before every result-you will be the same to me no matter what the result

you realised I was soon becoming an adult.

You tended to me, when I was ill

oh not only this - you also paid the bill.

Your assurance yet again, that I'd be fine

I felt like something I will never be able to define.

You are seeing me transform from your baby to a young lady

I love you, oh sooo much daddy.

How I wish I could be even one percent of what you are

You are and will always be my superstar.

I love you, my heart yells

and everytime i see you smile, my heart with happiness swells.

For your one smile, I can walk a mile

It's just YOU who has made my life worthwhile.

P.S.: I have the bestest daddy in this Universe. May God bless him with all the happiness and awesome dosome health.

PSS.: I Miss. Hoda bestow her dad with the "BEST DAD EVER" award. yay yay...:) Cheers!!!

PSSS: This is my bestest post till date and will always remain special to me!! :)

hIs PoInT oF vIeW!!!

2011-04-01T12:01:00.003-04:00

"Hmmm" Jason muttered hugging her from behind. His hands lay possessively on her tummy.

"So, how was your day?" He whispered in her ears.

She was more than taken aback, she smiled to herself and continued beating the batter with little less mobility; thanks to her husband of 2 years.

Jason had gotten into the house with the spare keys that he usually carried with him, cos he knew his wife very well. Once if she got busy preparing her dessert she would never answer the door. Rose loved trying out new desserts and most of the evenings when Jason got back from work he would make his way straight to the kitchen stare at his wife for a good few minutes and then go and hug her tight.

"I missed you" he whispered yet again.

Jason thought the sun was almost kissing the earth, cos he could feel the heat and light on his face directly. After a couple of attempts he managed to open his eyes.

"Oh Rose, I love you" He whispered.

"Do you even realise you are on my mind 24x7?. My day begins and ends with you, and now see you do not even spare my dreams"! He was blabbering to himself.

"So maybe, we do actually have a future together after all" He laughed. Jason was happy, who wouldn't be. He had just dreamt of getting married to the girl who he was in love for the past 5-6 years.

He picked up his cell phone to call her up, she didn't answer his call. He got busy with his daily chores. After a couple of hours he sat to read the newspaper, but ended up thinking of only her! He tried her number yet again, she didn't answer. Maybe she would be in the kitchen trying out something new, he tried to make himself understand. But deep down he knew that things were just not the same between them.

He was tired of trying all the time, maybe I try too hard is the kind of thoughts that had started coming to his head. He had left everything to time and God. This time he did not want to be the one to take the initiative. He wanted Rose to take the first step this time.

He put the paper aside. His cell phone rang, he picked it up and was mesmerised seeing her number flash. So well, Rose called him up finally.

"Hey, I need some coffee powder" She stated as a matter of fact.

" ya ya, come home" He was very smiling. His happiness knew no bounds.

"Or do you want me to come and give it?" He offered.

"Err, can you please?" She pleaded. He fell in love with her over again.

"Sure, gimme a moment" He told, real excited.

In less than a minute, he rung her door bell.

Mink, her brother opened the door.

"Hey dude!" Jason called out and punched him on the chest.

Mink called out to Rose. As expected she was in the kitchen.

She came hurriedly and smiled.

"Hey thanks Jay" She smiled. He loved the way she called him.

He loved the way she looked at him, no no actually he loved the way she looked. He loved the way she smile, she laughed. He loved the way she crinkled her nose, he loved the way she ticked her hair behind the ear. He loved the way she looked in the nightgown and the way she looked when she was in her skirt. He loved her more than anything in this world. He wished to get married to her one day, father her kids. He wanted to grow old with her. He wanted to spend his entire life with her, his joys, his sorrows...everything!

He stood staring at her, all these thoughts running in his mind.

Rose and Jason stood facing each other but spoke nothing. Nothing at all. He quietly handed her the coffee powder and she made her way to the kitchen. He stared at her back till she disappeared.

Jason stayed around for an hour or so in the living room. Rose would come for a minute or two and then go back into the kitchen. Every time she appeared in the living room, their eyes would meet for a flutter of seconds and then they both would look away.

"What went wrong" He would often ask himself.

Rose loved him, she herself had told him that and he had also confessed his feelings for her. But over the years things had changed, they both were aware of this. Jason hated this fact. But he really was tired of trying. He wanted time to take it's course and knew if they were destined to be together they would.

At times he wondered, if he would keep her happy all his life. May be she is better off without me, he would think at times. Then again his blood would boil imagining his Rose with another guy. He was confused, so was she. Were they meant to be together? He missed their old times, he missed his Rose.

He went back home and opened his dairy -

There is something amiss,

it no longer feels bliss

wrong where did we go?

with happiness no more I glow

Let destiny decide and

to it we shall abide...

PS: I tried my level best dude, hope it's nice :)

PSS : As I wait for a sign so I know you are mine

Everyday I look in the mirror and see you face

The walls break down down when you smile at me

And the world's much brighter than the one I see...

L.I.F.E.....

2011-03-20T10:25:00.002-04:00

Margaret dragged herself out of bed, she felt light today than she had felt in ages. She knew today was the day that she had dreaded, since the past months.
She got ready and put the black scarf on her head and swiflty made her way out of the house. She did not notice her husband having breakfast nor did she pay any heed to her 10 year old son still sleeping. She had to get there at the earliest. 'He' was waiting for her, just like 'he' had waited for her for the last one year.

She wanted to walk down, feel the chill in the wind on her face. Afterall she felt lively today, she smiled a sad one. She hugged herself tight, a gesture to warm her insides, nah it just didn't help!She had lost oodles of weight had the worst dark circles and felt tired like hell. She halted at the local flower shop;

'Morning Margaret" Lobo called out.
"Hey there" She smiled.
"21 roses?" He questioned.

"22" She corrected.
She saw pity and sympathy in Lobo's eye,did she really want sympathy? The entire city sympathised with her, but no one could get her what she wanted the most. No one.

After having paid the cash, she started walking again. Fresh tears welled in her eyes. No baby I won't cry, she promised. I won't.

A couple of hours later -

Margaret was sitting near her son who today would have turned 22, had he not been murdered last year. She looked with blank eyes at her son's graveyard.
"Oh, baby!" She wailed, as loudly as she could.
"I miss you. Can you not come back to your mom? I promise I will bake your favourite cake and not force you to share it with anyone."
"Just once, please come back"
She was panting for breath.
"See, I got you roses. You like them no? You always loved them, I know.
"Speak to me sweetheart, can you hear me?"
"Oh Jesus, did it have to be him only?"
She was choking, struggling for words, breath her life...everything!

Margaret covered her face with her hands, stuffed her handkerchief in her mouth, because the intensity of her wailing only increased by the second.This she knew would only be hurting her son, he had told her so last nite in her dream.

"Mom, please don't ever cry.It hurts me every time I see you cry, it hurts me real bad. I know you miss me, but I am happy here." Was what he had told her last nite.
"Mom, please try and come to terms with the fact that you will never see me again. Never again. Please mom, 'tis the fact".
"Mom, you have to live for dad and Lewis -they need you as much as you need them. Plesae Mom, don't kill yourslef. Let our family not break."

Margaret had promised she would do exactly wat her son told her.

Today was the first time she had cried in the past one year. She sat there for hours together...
crying fo the lovely times that she had shared with her son, only wishing if there could have been more..
crying for the love that they had shared and the emptiness she felt now
crying for herslef and him...Lewis and LObhas
crying at the laughters and the sorrows that they has witnessed in the past 21 years
crying for the joy that she had felt when she had held her kid in her arms for the first time and the numbness that she felt when his body had arrived in ths city
crying for she could not have saved her kid from his murderers
crying bcos she wanted answers and knew she would get none

"Oh baby, I promised last nite I wouldn't cry" She spoke amidst tears as fresh ones filled her eyes.
"See, see...I am not crying anymore. Your mom is laughing. ya ya she is laughing"

And she broke down again. She cried, and only cried.

After a couple of hours, the tears just wouldn't come. She was exhausted to the core.
The sun was settling in, she had been with her son for the entire day.

"Hey mom" Lewis came running to her.
He hugged her as tight as he could. For the first time in the past one year she let him hug her, infact she huuged him back.
"Mommy, I was scared I lost you as well" Lewis broke into tears.
She only held him tight.

"Oh sweety, I am so sorry Plesae forgive your mom, will you?" She started to cry once again.
"Mommy, I love you. Please lets go home and let Nick sleep well" He told Margaret.
She nooded at his innocence.

She stood up, her legs felt numb - she felt no different.
"Mom, watch out" Lewis yelled only to realise his dad in no time had held his mom and saved her a good fall.

Lobhas held his wife tight in his arms. Lewis came and hugged them as tigt as he could, as Nick watched them.This was the first time the entire family had come together to see Nick...

They walked hand in hand towards their home.They felt united and at peace with one another after a long long time

Margaret turned back and saw Nick smile at her, she smiled back - her most radiant one in the past 12 months.

Nick was at peace and so was Margaret.

PS : I feel NUMB after having written this! My heart goes out to all the parents who have lost their kids.

Everything changes...

2011-03-17T11:44:00.009-04:00

"You think you can ever love me?" Sameer asked, his heart in his mouth. Please say yes
"Ever?" He asked again.

All she did was sigh.

"Do you know, I have been in love with you for over five years now" He informed.
She only nodded her head, too overwhelmed to speak.
"I will keep you happy, I promise" He continued.
"Please" Finally Simi spoke. He was glad to hear her. He loved her voice, he loved everything about her. You are just a friend
"Hey, you are an awesome friend, that's how I think of you; and that's how I have always thought of you". Simi replied Please don't spoil our friendship
"Do you see any possibility of ever loving me, Sim?" he asked
"No" Came the prompt reply.

The next couple of minutes passed in silence.

"Sameeer, perhaps in the next couple of years I will be married" Simi quipped Please don't break, please.
" Does your mum know that there is a guy who loves more than anyone can and will ever love you, Sim" He stated as a matter of fact.

This took her by surprise, she was stunned.

"Yeah, I think so" Simi mumbled.
"You think so?!!" He laughed in sarcasm.
" Go tell her, Sim please" He pleaded. Please, please
" But I don't feel for you that way, Sameeer please understand" This time she pleaded.

He laughed.

"Oh God wat have I been doing with my life?" He questioned himself.
"Look at this Sim, here I love you so much and I want to spend the rest of my life loving you but you don't love me. You just never loved me, you never will". There was sadness in his voice.She knew things would not remain the same between them ever again.

She was hurting, cos she knew how hurt he was.

They had been great friends for more than six years now and shared their lives.
" Just do me a favour Sim, just once speak to your mum. Tell her I exist, that I love you so much.Just once" He requested I know you won't
"ok" Simi replied. I won't

" Chal then, I will hang up you go study, I will call you after dinner" Sameer told
"Bye, please take care of yourself" She now requested.

He smlied. She felt drained.
He called up after a couple of hours.

"Hey, had dinner" He tried his level best to sound normal.

She knew he was not ok, he was hurting.

"I sat on a two wheeler today" He informed. At this very instant Simi knew things would just not be the same henceforth.
Simi detested two-wheelers and had convinced him to stop using them, it had taken alot to convince him but she had succeeded.
"Hmmm" Simi replied, whilst going through her notes. She was hurting, real bad. why are you doing this
"I think I was a fool, running behind some one who I always knew would never be mine" He continued. I still love you

"Did you speak to aunty?" He finally managed to ask, his voice shaky cos deep down he knew what she would answer. I know you didn't

"Ummm, yeah" Was all Simi told You know, I didn't, don't you?!
"I am sorry, but don't worry nothing changes between us. We are friends and shall remain so" Simi could hear the smile in his voice.

Everything changes, Simi sighed to herself.
Everything did change after that.
Everything. Period.

Sameer wished to walk out of Simi's life. Sim let him.

PS: Isn't change the only thing constant in life?!!

Aren't we blessed...

2011-03-13T13:04:00.004-04:00

Aren't we blessed ;

To have lived a minute more than the person who just passed away.
To hear the wind blow in the silent nite and the birds chirp early in the mroning.
To be able to decipher amongst the different colors that make the world such a beautiful place to live in.
To be physically fit and fine and free from life threatning diseases.
To have crossed the road without the aid of some one.
To have expressed our feelings for the peolpe we care about.
To have such adorable parents and a rocking family.
To have our meals, without worrrying over the fact whether we will be able to afford the next meal.
To be able to connect to our near and dear ones as and when we wish to.
To know, that someone out there loves us more than what we love ourselves.
To be able to taste the sweet ice cream and sour lemon.
To have loved some one to death.
To have visited the costliest salon just for a massage, when a person out there craves for medical attention.
To fuss over what to wear tomorrow, when an old lady shivers in the cold nite on the road.
To see the sun early morning and the moon & stars in the night.
To drink everything possible under the sun to perch our thirst, when kids out there drink contaminated water.
To sleep on our soft beds with a softerr pilow, when people out there sleep on roads with dogs.

May be we aren't living the life, that we wished for but what the heck we ceratinly are much more privileged than many.

Maybe we wished to have a bunglow, but hell a 1BHK is not all that bad.
Maybe we wished to vist the Tai today, but the hotel near your home is ok.
Maybe we wished to board a flite, but a train ride is more enjoyable.
Maybe we wished to travel to work by our private vehicles, feel blessed atleast we can afford the bus and tarin ticket.
Maybe we wished to to have an AC at home, thank God we have a fan.
Maybe we wished to go on a vacation every three months, oh c'mon once a year is not all that bad.
Maybe we wished to have that girl/guy love us back, never mind some one out there loves you more than you will ever know.
Maybe we wished we do everything right but then again its only the mistakes that
imparts the learning...no?
Maybe we wished to have a fairly tale life, never mind we atleast got to read them.
Maybe we wished for a life full of joys, but would we cherish them had we not faced the sorrows.
Maybe we wished to have a better paying job, feel happy that atleast we aren't unemployed.
Maybe we wished to live our life on our terms and conditions, would we enjoy it as much as we enjoy it now?
Maybe we wished to have a size zero figure, but you are loved anyways - size zero or not.

Learn to see the postive side in any situation - I am trying real hard to do the same. Apprecaite things, even if it's as small a thing as a smile from some one least expected.Every nite when you go to bed, say a silent thank you to God for all that he gave you during the day.

PS: And here I was thinking I am runnig out of ideas and I was maha depressed cos I have been trying to complete 3 posts simultaneously from friday even!! Gosh, I was so scared, worried..ok now, enough of my melodrama :p!

I went for a walk today evening to sort myself out, cos I oh so needed this ME time. And I am soo happy now, cos I am all sorted and boy do I feel relieved. I think my problem in life is that I feel all the problems in the world is faced by me alone, which is no where close to the truth and that's when the idea of this post was conceived cos I truly am blessed :)

Stay blessed people and yeah appreacitae the lil things in life - I do :)

If you're not the one

2011-03-11T10:36:00.002-05:00

If you're not the one then why does my soul feel glad today?
If you're not the one then why does my hand fit yours this way?
If you are not mine then why does your heart return my call?
If you are not mine would I have the strength to stand at all?

I never know what the future brings
But I know you're here with me now
We'll make it through
And I hope you are the one I share my life with

I don't wanna run away but I can't take it, I don't understand
If I'm not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am?
Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?

If I don't need you then why am I crying on my bed?
If I don't need you then why does your name resound in my head?
If you're not for me then why does this distance maim my life?
If you're not for me then why do I dream of you as my wife?

I don't know life so far away
But I know that its just a trip
We'll make it through
And I hope you are the one I share my life with
And I wish that you could be the one I die with
And I'm praying you're the one I'Ve build my home with
I hope I love you all my life

I don't wanna run away but I can't take it, I don't understand
If I'm not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am
Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?

'Cause I miss you, body and soul so strong that it takes my breath away
And I breathe you into my heart and pray for the strength to stand today
'Cause I love you, whether it's wrong or right
And though I can't be with you tonight
You know my heart is by your side

I don’t wanna run away but I can’t take it, I don’t understand
If I’m not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am
Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?

All rite, no raised eyebrows people!! It's one of my favourite songs, that I can hear back to back n number of times. The singer is Daniel Bedingfield, isn't he just oh sooo cool??!!

PS : :) :)

Just another day in my life....

2011-03-08T09:27:00.006-05:00

The headfone neatly tucked into my ears, the handbag (not purse :P) on my right shoulder with my favourite colored churidar on I was hurrying towards the rick stand. Got one luckily, the more I neared the station the more I tried to peep, to make sure I wouldn't miss the train by a second or so. In the midst of all this my cell beeped, I smiled to myself -here comes the first Women's day text!! I checked my cell phone and was more than shocked to read Mansi!!I mean a women's day text from a person like Ms. Kapoor -just not happening. Never mind all this, so well I managed to get into the train I wanted to. That's when I read Ms. Kapoor's text -

Ms. Kapoor : Undoubtedly the BEST message - Sumone wrote on the door of heart "Plesae do not enter I'm upset" but FRIENDS came smiling & said "SORRY, we're ILLITERATE" gudmorng!em>

Me was somewhat disheartened, cos I was hoping for a women's day text.So the person that I am, I replied back

Ms. Hoda : Hey, n me thot u texted 2 wish Women's day....have a gr8 day ahead, tc!

Ms. Kapoor: There is no specific day like that, 365 days are for women only, d other gender is just exisiting along with us and because of us. We are the queen bees there is no king bee all of them are drones :) helpers u c :)

Ms. Hoda: Haha, jus like you

Ms. Kapoor: What do you mean?

Ms. Hoda : The feminist baby, in a gud way..

Ms. Kapoor : :)

So well, I really dunno why I blogged about it, but this exchange of texts made me happy, real happy!! Infact, texting always give me happiness, n I am real quick at it, it's my favourite time pass you see - many will vouch for it!!

PS: I had a rocking day at work, nothing great but just in general. Nope wait, yeah my first ever CTL sent me a happy women's day e-mail - yay yay, I totally adore her, she is one of the strongest woman I have come across!! :) My other CTL also e-mailed, that was real sweet of him!!

And how can I forget, Aarti Sareen - You brightened up my day baby - Thanks, thanks, thanks, for sending the drawing of Mr. Shin Chan Nohara to me -I am gonna treasure it all my life!! Love ya!! :)

PSS: All you people out there - please pick up the phone and call up the people you love and tell the so. NOW. Life is very unpredictable, you never know what turn it might take - live for today!

Ms. Kapoor, I am praying - your boss will be fine in just a jiffy!! God bless her...

..................

2011-03-05T06:16:00.005-05:00

Just what any girl would want her guy to say....
"I love that you get cold when it's seventy degrees out. I love that it takes you an hour and a half to order a sandwich. I love that you get a little crinkle above your nose when you're looking at me like I'm nuts. I love that after I spend a day with you I can still smell your perfume on my clothes, and I love that you are the last person I want to talk to before I go to sleep at night.And it's not because I'm lonely, and it's not because it's New Year's Eve. I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible"
-When Harry met Sally

The new age -internet love :)
"I like to start my notes to you as if we're already in the middle of a conversation. I pretend that we're the oldest and dearest friends- as opposed to what we actually are- people who don't know each other's names and met in a chat room where we both claimed we'd never been before. What will NY152 say today, I wonder. I turn on my computer, I wait impatiently as it boots up. I go online, and my breath catches in my chest until I hear three little words: You've got mail. I hear nothing, not even a sound on the streets of New York, just the beat of my own heart. I have mail. From you."
- You've Got Mail

The most famous and that would make anyone go awwww kind of a thingie.....
"I am just a girl standing in front of a boy asking him to love her."
-Notting Hill

The indirect proposal...;)
"The man of my dreams has almost faded now. The one I have created in my mind. The sort of man each woman dreams of in the deepest and most secret reaches of her heart. I can almost see him now before me. What would I say to him, if he were really here? Forgive me, I have never known this feeling. I've lived without it all my life. Is it any wonder, then, that I fail to recognize you? You-- who brought it to me for the first time. Is there any way I can tell you how my life has changed? Any way at all to let you know what sweetness you have given me? There is so much to say...I cannot find the words. Except for these-- I love you! Such would I say to him, if he were really here."
-The Bridges of Madison County

Just wow...
"It seems right now that all I've ever done in my life is making my way here to you."
"This kind of certainty comes but once in a lifetime."
- Captain Corelli's Mandolin

Realization time...
"When you fall in love, it is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake, and then it subsides. And when it subsides, you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots are become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part."
-City of Angels

Passion...all the way
"I would rather have had one breath of her hair, one kiss from her mouth, one touch of her hand, than eternity without it."
"When they ask me what I liked best, I'll say it was you."
- Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon

Any takers??!
Prince Henry:" You told me it was a matter of life or death."
Leonardo da Vinci:"A woman always is."
-Hope Floats

:)
"Dancing is just a conversation between two people. Talk to me."
-A Knight's Tale

And here comes my favourites :)
"I'm beginning to think that maybe it's not just how much you love someone. Maybe what matters is who you are when you're with them."
-The Accidental Tourist

".....I think I'd miss you even if we'd never met."
"The hardest part of love isn't loving someone, but having the courage to let them love you back."
-The Wedding Date

"Have you never met a woman who inspires you to love? Until your every sense is filled with her? You inhale her. You taste her. You see your unborn children in her eyes and know that your heart has at last found a home. Your life begins with her, and without her it must surely end."
-Don Juan DeMarco

Since morning, I had been wanting to write something super duper romantic, nope love is still not in the air for me - sad but 'tis the truth! Since, I couldn't think of anything to pen down by myself - I picked up a couple of lines from romantic movies. I love this post of mine, hope you guys like it as well!!

PS: I haven't seen any of the movies mentioned above but one - When Harry met Sally that too in bits and pieces...perhaps I must watch a couple of them. Did this post awaken the romantic side in you?! ;)

Memoirs, yet again....

2011-02-28T10:01:00.000-05:00

Was it today, or yesterday? Was it in the morning , evening or night?! When was it that you were killed?? I need answers, at times it drives me crazy; trying to figure out what exactly would have happened a year back...the course of events that would have taken place the result of which is - YOU are not with us anymore! May your murderers be punished in the court of God, I know they WILL be!!

Till last year, I had only read such things in the newspaper, heard such dreadful stories and to think of it it happened to you, to us. A year has passed by, but it seems just yesterday when I remember praying, begging God that you be fine, that you be ok. Every second from the time, I got to know you were missing - I had begged God. And then finally the worst happened. It has still not yet sunk in, perhaps it never will.

Every morning, when I take the bus from Kurla to Andheri I always think about you. Always. Infact that's not the only time. I really miss you. At times, I hate myself that I could do nothing to save you, we could do nothing. If only we would have known you were in trouble, if only...

The sight of seeing your coffin on tv and your name scribbled on it does not let me sleep at night, nights. You were my most loved lil cousin brother, you still are and will always be.

I always thought of you as angel and angel now you are. Please give us all the strenght to live on. May your soul rest in peace.

PS: Life is a ****h!!!!

My second post on realizations!!

2011-02-12T11:46:00.005-05:00

The past two weeks have been very eventful, with a lot of stuff happening at work & otherwise and two friends getting married back to back!!! So well here comes my second post on realizations...:)
a couple of which I intend and hope to implement real soon

1. Ignorance is bliss - Ignore people who do not realise your worth!!!
2. Stand up for what YOU feel is correct - No matter who says what, always support the truth and what you feel is correct. Let the others (read people who r sick) bitch and back bite -do not CARE!!
3. Do not depend on anyone for anything - You will be happy, if you master this art!
4. Interact with people whom you like - Meeting new people and intreacting with them has always given me happiness of a different kind.
5. Hardwork and sincerity perhaps will pay in the long run - :)
6. Attend your friends weddings - You feel like - hayeee mera turn kab aayega...:D...on a serious note when you see your girlfriends transforming into women you go like awwww...:)
7. Do little things for your parents - It makes you feel awesome :)

PS. - To Sangiiii and Vithi - Hope you have a great married life ahead...God bless:)!!
All's well that end's well....no?!!! :)

........

2011-01-14T11:56:00.002-05:00

I thought I was a strong and brave girl but nope, I ain't one. The last one week starting Sunday has been a complete mess for me, actually the entire family. My maternal uncle had a brain haemorrhage on Sunday and unfortunately for us passed away on Monday morning. Ever since I have been at a complete loss, especially since he was in Mumbai just fifteen days back and had visited us just last to last saturady and how he had pampered me!

I miss my mama and will miss him always. Its so difficult to digest the fact that I will never be able to see him again, hear him again. Yes, I do have regrets in that I never expressed how much I loved and cherished him and its too late now. My heart cries and aches for my cousins and my mami (who also is my bua). May his soul rest in peace. I have cried myself to sleep all these days, cos thats the only thing that I feel like doing.

But life moves on, that I have realised and how! All that remains is a peculiar void that perhaps can and never will be filled.

So guys, a genuine request here -

Express - yourself. Meet up with the people whom you love, tell them that they mean the world to you. Kiss them. Hug them. Cherish them. If you can't meet them, call them up. Now. Pamper your mum. Hug your dad. Kiss that some one special. Hold hands with you best friend and just walk. Giggle with your siblings. Bond with your cousins. Spend time with your grandparents. Donate to the needy.

Apologise - It will mend a lot of broken relations. Its takes a lot to own up your mistakes, please do it if you have been at fault and even if you have not been at fault - it will only make the other person smile and probably realise their mistake.

Love - It is the most beautiful feeling. Love some one to death! Pamper them, adore them, cherish them, enjoy them. Just love them for who they are and what they mean to you. Kiss that special someone on the forehead. Smile when they are happy.

Enjoy - Life. Enjoy every second of your life, for you never know when it might take a turn you never wanted it to take

Thank - God for the life that he has given us and the beautiful people who make this life so worth living.

To all the people reading this and also to all those people who perhaps do not even know that my blog exists - I love you all! I am sorry if I have ever hurt you, believe me it was unintentional, neverthless I apologise from the bottom of my heart. May God bless you all.

PS : Was all that sharing and caring a facade??!!

Sumone.....

2010-12-30T10:14:00.009-05:00

Sumone who can see past my outer shell
and cast on me love's spell
Sumone with whom I can share
and with out shame swear

Sumone infront of whom, I can cry
and not once shy
Sumone who will hold me when I am low
and make sure with happiness I glow.

Sumone who will make my days bright
and give me a hug tight
Sumone who will hold my hands
as I walk on the sands.

Sumone who will watch me as I fall asleep
and wipe my tears as I weep
Sumone who will lend me his warmth as I shiver
when we sit beside the river.

Sumone who will love me for who I am
and help me sail through life's every exam
Sumone who will cherish my very being
and gift me a finger ring.

Sumone who will gift me a flower :)
and make sure we are together every hour
Sumone who will shower me with affection
and make all attempts that there remains a

LIFETIME connection :)

PS: I soooo sooo enjoyed penning this down and changing the template of my Blog....:). Hope it makes an interesting read and the template is eye friendly!!
Happy New Year ppl, have a blast :) God Blesss...

YeT aNoThEr AtTeMpT aT pOeTrY....

2010-12-26T11:55:00.004-05:00

"What's love?" One fine day he asked.
She smiled, here it comes finally at last.
"Love is beautiful" She replied.
"Oh! I so love her" his inside cried!

she asked "What if I fight?"
He smiled " Don worry, I will make sure everything is allrite"
"What if you get bored?" She was scared
"I will always love you" He declared.

"You will hate my cooking" she joked.
He replied " I swear I won't get choked"
She announced "I like evrything to be neat and clean"
He replied " Oh, I shall make sure everyhting is nice and serene".

"I will love you till my last breath" She was in tears
He smiled " We shall get married this new years"
She was anxious "What about our parents?"
He replied " We will make sure we have our fun moments!!"

And they did live happily ever after :)

Love in it's purest form....

2010-12-19T07:58:00.010-05:00

"What is life?" she asked.
"You" He smiled. She blushed.

" I love you" He quipped.
"Love you too" she answered.

They walked hand in hand on the beach. They were enjoying being with each other. The ring of his cell phone broke the spell.

"Happy anniversary Grandpa" Jack yelled.
" Thanks champ" He laughed. He held her hand tighter into his, she smiled. She was content being with him.

Jack was their eldest son's son. They adored him!

"Hey dad, Happy Anniversary!!! Hows ur honeymoon going?" Andrew, their son joked. "Where is ma?" He continued. Desmond passed the phone to his wife for thirty years - Patricia, never leaving her hand even for a single second.

"Thanks son" She answered. She put the cell phone into her husband's shirt pocket.

They walked aimlessly, mindless of the people around them. They were happy and that's exactly what mattered.

"What if I die tomorrow?" She muttered.
He din answer. " The kids there look so adorable, look at them" Desmond tried to divert her mind and evade her question.

"What if I die tomorrow?" Patricia persisited.
" I won't let you" He swore.
"But.." She was on the verge of breaking down.
"But...." She couldn't continue.

She tried to pull her hand from his to walk away many a times. He wouldn't let her go. He only held her hand tighter, still tighter.

"I won't let you..." He swore to himself once again.

It was more than two years now that Patricia had been diagnosed with cancer. These were her last days, that they both knew.

" Baby, do you want to wet your feet?" He cajoled.
"Yes" She smiled.

He helped her get up and they both walked hand in hand towards the water, mindless of the future - for they knew in their heart; wherever they would be - they would be together.

Today they were together - that's exactly what mattered.

Tomorrow also they would be together - Desmond swore once again!

Office Romance!!!

2010-11-04T13:35:00.007-04:00

She walked in, the heel of her sandal making noise in the early hours of the morning. She looked at his workstation, his laptop was not there "not yet come in" she muttered to herself. She was running late today. She put on her laptop and rushed for coffee, a must for her to begin her day and especially since she had so many things to worry about.

Her Laptop refused to open, she was frustrated to the core. "wow!!" she exclaimed.
"First I am not able to get into the forever over crowed bus, then I hail a rick after a lot of failed efforts which then breaks down in the middle of no where, and then I walk for like 20 minutes only to find out he is not in office yet!!" All in one breath. She realised in a second what she had spoken, she looked around to see if anyone had overheard her. Luckily she started her day quite early and not many people had turned up as yet. She thanked God. For the nth time she looked at the door. Her friend walked in, damn she muttered couldn't it be him??!!

He walked in talking and giggling on his cell phone. She looked in his direction immediately, she loved his laughter. She smiled. Her Laptop started working, she smiled again. The day looked better to her now. She forgot about her worries and started work on an important assignment. They had clients coming in today, the designs had to be ready by then. The moment he sat on his chair, he looked in her direction. " Engrossed in work as usual" he sighed. He got busy with another call. Again he looked at her, pink suits her he thought. Nope, pink was meant for her, he corrected himself. Just so that he could get a complete glimpse of her, he got up and walked near her work station on the pretext of talking to a friend. She looked up at him at the same moment and smiled, he too smiled.

The day was dragging for him. He so wanted to ask her out, but was sacred she would reject him. He wanted to date her actually, he wanted to know her better. He sighed.

"What the hell" She thought. "Can he just not come and talk to me, for that matter ask me for coffee?"
" Nope, he is waiting for Christams" She answered herself.
He had wanted to talk to her, ever since the day she had joint office. He really liked her, no loved her.
She had her eyes set on him, the day she had walked in for the first time. She really loved him.
He was waiting for her to drop the hint and she for him.
She got a call from her boss, the clients had arrived. The meeting went on for two hours. She was really tired. She walked upto her wokstation, looked around to search for him. "Had he left for the day"? she was disheartened to the core. "Damn him", she muttered.
"Hi, how did the meeting go? I heard you guys got the project?" She looked up into his nervous yet smiling face.
"Yup" She smiled. They kept smiling for a couple of minutes. Awkard was the work to describe how they both felt.
"Coffee?" Finally he asked. "Yeah" She answered in a second.
They both smiled.

It was just the BEGINNING!! :)

PS: Guys please DO NOT wait for the other person to approach you, if you like sumone go ahead and let that person know. Atleast when you grow old there wouldn't be a regret that you did not try. And there in no harm whatsoever in expressing yourself. So what, if you are rejected?? Try, Try until u succeed is the mantra :D..! On a serious note, if you are rejected then, there is someone, somewhere better waiting to walk in to your Life!! Life is short, enjoy it too the fullest..!! :)

Drinking is injurious to Health & Life!!!!

2010-10-16T13:00:00.009-04:00

"Hey, Gudmorning" He whispered so as to not disturb her sleep. He brushed his lips through her forehead and then hair.
"Did you sleep well?" he continued. "I hardly slept" he nearly choked now. Tears won. "I miss you babes"! He muttered.
He composed himself and continued, " Happy Birthday Baby"!! He smiled, a weak smile amid tears. "I so Love you, will always love you....no matter what."

"Gudmorning Sir" The nurse walked in. "Its a bright Sunday" she smiled.
Sameer managed to flash his brighest smile. " How are you?" He questioned.
"Great" she winked at him. "And I am sure your princess is also doing great" She smiled.
The nurse examined Suhaan and said "Excellent improvement, the Doctor should be here in a while now; I will see you guys later then" and walked out of the room.
"Aren't we used to this Suhaan, daily from the past 3 months!!??!!" Sameer exclaimed!! Frustration was getting to him now.
"You are doing great, you are doing great....why do not u talk to me then?? dammit"
"God I love you, do you hear me??!!" He yelled now.
"Please come back baby" He pleaded, desperation pretty clear in his voice.

The door opened, a middle aged person waalked in with a grin on his face and stethoscope in his hand.
"How is Mrs. Mehra, today?" he asked.
Sameer swore " Am I the doctor?" and then smiled to cover it up.
The Doctor choose to ignore it. He examined Suhaan and then left hastily.
Suhaan had been more or less a vegetable since the past 3 months now, ever since that fateful nite when their car had met with an accident while returning from a party. Sameer had been behind the wheels. He had escaped widout a scratch and poor Suhaan...... Sameer had swore then, he would never touch alcohol ever again. Never.
Suhaan had anyways always been against it. Against him drinking. Against anyone drinking. She would advice anyone she met...please do not drink, it harms your body. And here she was, because of him, because of his drinking. His drinking. God how he hated himself.

He was exhausted, he fell asleep his head on her bed near her feet. " He has been beside you ma'am ever since you landed here" He could hear some one talking..could not make out who it was.
" You are lucky ma'am, he really loves and adores you" The voice continued, he had to get up now..he forced his eyes open. It was the nurse's voice. He stared at her. He continued to stare at her. He was scared to look elsewhere. He thought he was dreaming. Slowly he turned around to look if anyone was present in the room. No one. He again looked at the nurse, confused, excited, tensed...tears literally ready to flow. He was just soo sacred to look where Suhaan lay. Scared that it might not be true. Scared that....

"Heyy" came her voice. He turned slowly to where Suhaan lay...his lips trembling..his heart pounding in his chest, his fingers crossed.
She smiled at him. He broke down.
"I will never drink baby" He swore. He got up from the chair that had been his home since the past three months and came up beside her.
He bent to kiss her.
His Suhaan was back.

PS: To all my dearest friends, who drink....please please please STOP drinking...!!It KILLS. Always remember, your life is just NOT your's. So please STOP drinking, if not for yourself then atleast for the sake of your near and dear ones and the ones who CARE for you!! God Blesss..!!

Love Never Dies...

2010-10-03T04:32:00.005-04:00

He was awakened by the smell of strawberries, he so loved this fragrance, her fragrance.
"Good Morning" he smiled through sleepy eyes. She was all ready to go to work. He smiled again.
"You got in late yesterday? Again?" She questioned one hand at her hips.
He only smiled, just like my sweetheart his heart murmered.
She was about to step out of the room, when he yelled "Happy Anniversary"!
She stopped where she was and a second later was in his arms. "You remembered?" she smiled through mist eyes. He only shook his head, too emotional to utter a word, he held her tight. "Do you have anything important at work today?" he continued. She shook her head in negation.
"Great "he anounced. And gigled, she looked at him questioningly.

A Couple Of Hours Later
" Woow" I just love Goa!! She squealed with happiness. He loved to see this expression on her face.
He took her to a very pretty and serene hotel and the window of their room had a great view. She stood there loking at the sand and water and smiling to herself. He came up behind her, held her for a couple of minutes; "lunch"? he quiped.

Another Hour later
Their hunger in check, they were back in their room...the sun was just setting in...
"Lets go dowm and walk on the beach" he offered.
"Not yet", she winked and walked upto him.

Another Hour later
Sim and Sam were walking hand in hand on the beach. Enjoying their togetherness, smiling to themselves.
" I love you" he whisphered.
Sim smiled.
" We should do this more often" He offered again
Sim Smiled.
"You look amazing wid your hair open" he whisphered again
Sim continued to smile.
"May be we should stay here for a week or so?'' He questioned.
Sim answered wid a smile.
He, smiled. "May be swetty we must settele in Goa, since you so love it"
She smile, pulled her hand away from his and piked up pace. She started running now.
"Sim" He yelled, too shocked.
Sim, wat happened?'' Allrite we wont shift here, darling wat's wrong? ok ok...No late nite meetings Sweetheart...I promise"...he was at the verge of crying....! All this while he was running,,trying to catch up wid Sim
"Sim, Sim, Simmm..." He called.." Hang on Baby" He called again.
Sim turned, luked at him. He could see a dash of tears in here eye, she shook her head and piked up pace again.
"Sim...Sim..."

"SIM...SIM.." It was for the nth time now that Sam had woken up in this manner...Calling Sim...ever since he had lost her to an accident......
He picked up her photograph form the adjoining table and held it to his chest, just the way he had held her, his Sim in his dream..

Blogging sans comments :-( :-(

2010-08-29T04:34:00.002-04:00

Alrite, so the Title says it all, no??!! I love to write and yes I do not write just for comments et al, but it really feels great if frnds comment...so guys plsssss do d honors!! I mean I know u guys do like my posts, atleast dats wat u guys convey via texts or wen we talk :-), n yes it does feel wow types...but you know I would highly appreciate if you leave a comment back...the blog will luk more lively...wot say??! :-)

Memoirs...!!

2010-08-01T12:15:00.003-04:00

It's been over five months now that you left this world...all of us...and not a single day passes when I don't think of you sweetheart...! I wish I would have let you know how much I loved you, how much I treasured you...but no one knew you would leave us all soooo soon..!!

22 is such a young age to die...dying is inevitable, that I know...but such a death?? Y God?? Y?? without any fault of yours Sweety....I wish I knew you were in trouble...that one day that you were untraceable...I prayed as hard as I could, begged God that you be safe...but unfortunatley God had other plans. You were and will always be one of my favourite cousins...

Your Childhood memoirs that I will always cherish and treasure is you hitting on my head and running and I would turn around and yell at your dad...Chachu, yeh kya hai??....and you would run as fast as you could, giggling at having succeded in irritating me...I din have the slightest idea you would run so far away and so fast...only God alone knows when I will be able to catch up with you!

All I pray now is that, your mum n dad have the strength to move ahead in Life...! Its just soooo difficult to believe that you are not there any more...I can only imagine what your parents would be going through...! Not having knowledge about how exactly you died, what exactly happened, why it happened, who did it, why they did it....to such an adorable kid like you baby..!!

You were n will always be the most loved kid in the entire extended Family...and we all miss you sooo terribly and crying is all that we can do!

I will forever treasure all the vacations that we spent together....playing, fighting, irritating each other....n all the fun that we had...!! I was soo happy when you secured admission in an Engineering college, I was soo proud of you...But I din know, I had never in my wildest dream imagined it would happen to you ..to us...!

I just hope n pray that up there you are happy, please protect us all and give us all the strenght to move on...Love you always!!

Conversations...!!

2010-07-24T03:18:00.011-04:00

Finally, I am back to blogging after a long period of hibernation.

So, well I just celebrated my 24th B'day, yeah m getting old and everything was going just perfect. I had a great time at work, I mean even though m just like two months old at work, my friends there made sure I felt special n yeah I got a gift too :-)! My sis gave me a call and asked me to meet her at Matunga, in a restaurant just opposite (my) Ruia college where I have spent five great years of my life!! I almost instantly understood my friends were behind all this 'read surprise', I mean why would my sis meet me near Matunga for shopping or watever reason?? So then I wrapped up my work and left office as soon as I could, took a rick to Andheri station and then boarded a train....n I was just thaking God for all that he has given me.

Then I remembered I had to reply to some b'day texts...I opened my inbox and there were two texts from unknown nos...I replied to them saying thanks for ur wishes, but I don seem to have your no..!! After some time I got a call from an unknown no...

Long Lost Forgotten Friend (LLFR): Hi, its me (followed by his complete name!!!)
Me: Oh hi..In my mind"watever dude, get it done wid!!"
LLFR: "In a sarcastic tone" Its my no, abhi pata chala"?
Me: oohhkk
LLFR: "I know u don have my no...thats y I called up"!!
Me: In my mind "as if I care dude"!!!
LLFR: "I called up to say just this".
Me: "Sure, Bye"!
LLFR: "Bye tc"!!
Me: In my mind "I certainly m better off widout ur tc!!"

After I kept the phone, I was like WTH man..?? How can any XYZ person call me up and speak however they want to..?? So I texted him back.....
Me:"My day was going real great sans ur sarcastic call and voice"
LLFR: I din mean to sound sarcastic, I m jus real hurt u don have my no..n some blah n some more blah...!!
LLFR: Another loooonggg msg with some more blah and some more blah and some more never ending blahhh..
Me: *Sick expression* not againn!! "Kindly spare me, thanks!!" *satisfied grin*

All this entertainment for sure kept me occupied all through and I reached college and walked into DP's to find some of the COOLEST PPL in my life waiting for me with a lush looking cake!!! Boy was I excited, yeaaaahhh...though I was expecting this bt still.....thanks a ton guys..

Avani for that excellent collage and for being soo decked up even though it was not ur b'day :;-), I am going to treasure the collage all my lifee!!
Kruti for coming, even though you were down wid cold and fever and thanks for passing the cold to me...Swaru r u ok?? * Evil grin* :-0
Swaru for being her chirpy self and making my day sooo very special, taking a half day from her Lab and how can I forget your one liners!!!
Hrishi for complimenting me and taking a half day from his Lab jus 2 make my day special!!

So, then began the process of blowing the candles...and I was forced to do it untill they were all blown off..the candles being the ones that lighten up again untill you put them in water!! I was dizzy by the time I had blown them all....and in the process my so called friends forgot to sing the b'day song so I did the honours and then the realisation dawned on them and then they sang.... :-)!!
And then we ate and ate and ate...n laughed, laughed....n laughed some more...we still enjoy the sad lil jokes that we shared like 2 yrs back!

Then we all hugged, kissed and finally left for our respective homes.. me a happy self!!!
On the way home I was on d phone wid my elder sis :-) :-) :-). My lfe, my day is soooo verryy incomplete if I don talk to her..!!
All through I had forgotten abt that encounter read disgusting wid that LLFR!! All in all I had a rocking b'day recieved texts, calls and e-mails from lots of friends that I have managed to make all through my jorney in life..

I went off to sleep real happy and content....thanked God again for everything..!
All's well that ends well....no?? :-)

PS: Btw the second unknown no has not yet replied back...m glad!! :-) *grinsss*

My SeCoNd attempt at poetry n I am lovin it...!! :-) :-)

2009-10-09T21:54:00.002-04:00

Jack & Jill met at school

on a day called april's fool

on one bench they sat

& together lunch they had

They stuck to each other till the 10th grade

& then realised it was almost a decade!

Different fields they chose

But never in between came their egos.

They struggled to be in touch

and handy came hutch (gosh...wat wat I do for rhyming!! ;-) )

Days turned into years

to their friendship three cheers!!

'I love her' one fine day Jack realised

& with this Jill was surprised..

Their friendship was on rocks

& to convince her, he sent a sweet box.

Jill thot 'we are better as friends'

and din meet him on weekends!

Jack moved on & found a girlfriend

& to their friendship Jill put an end..

Jill cried

& their friendship died.

"Was it love" Jill cried

But then realised she was happy being some one else's bride!!

Jill relaised it was never love

but always friendship

& to his messages she gave a skip...

Jill wanted Jack to be on his own

but then realised he always was unknown.

How Jack is Jill din kno

But had wished him gud luck long ago!

Jill found someone

he was one in a billion

Jill din miss jack

& din want him in her life bak.

To an end came a friendship

Hope you enjoyed reading it!!! :-)

PS:I had written this poem long ago,like 2 months back and had actually saved it as a draft too...but then I got soooooooooooooo sooooooooo busy with my sis ka wedding preparations that I hardly had time to breathe,forget blogging!!Now that its done :-) :-) :-) n I am bak from B'lore here it is..!!Hope it makes an intresting read!!

Where are we headed to??

2009-08-16T12:11:00.010-04:00

The news channels updating us about the swine flu toll and all the precautionary measures to be taken is for sure a stale one now...even a five year old kid would know it by heart now...what with soo much of media hype!

'Shahrukh' detianed at Newark airport,US is the latest 'Breaking News'..Nahh..Shahrukh 'Khan' detained at Newark airport,US....perfect!!

Now there are two angles to it,I believe...

One, it could be a publicity gimmick since his new movie 'My name is Khan' will be releasing soon.Well promoting a product or movie must be done, but certainly not by stooping to such low levels.I somehow find this difficult to digest though...obviously because he has always been my favourite actor rite since my school days (I have a soft corner for him u see :-) ) and besides indulging in something like this would certainly call for an international issue...well it already is now!

Two, Because of the 'Khan' tag! And if this is so,I really don't know where are we headed to..!I mean if a person of such a stature can be targeted and detained then God bless the middle class people like us...no?? Daily I guess thousands of Khans would be being targeted and detained for absolutely no fault of theirs. The whole thing is being blown out of proportion I believe is only because he is a celebrity.Who the hell cares for people like us...no one would even bother!!

Take back home message....Aren't we all aware of the fact that all fruit baskets have a couple of rotten fruits,but do we suspicially scrutinize all the other ones also in the basket? Or do we discard (blame it on my scientific background!) them all completely??!!Think about it...

The US officials are playing it safe and blaming it on the cultural mismatch saying that Indians are too used to VIP treatment, even at the cost of security considerations (the newspaper says so!). Just look at their audacity...

But at the end of it...speculation is all we can do..!!

Whatever the reason may be for all this hullaboo...all I can think of now to conclude this is where are we headed to..??

PS: Lemme know your views..!!

I hAvE rEaLiZeD....

2009-08-14T05:57:00.015-04:00

After a rather sad post, here’s my next one....which hopefully is not sad!!

Since the past couple of months, I have done nothing but lukhagiri so I had a lot of what people call "ME" time. N in this "ME" time I reflected back on the past years and realized that well...I have realized a lot of things n here I pen dem down....hope it makes an interesting read. Some I realized all along n some I realized in the past couple of months and some last nite....n its not in the order of my realization...

I HAVE REALIZED THAT... (Its a common one, so that you don't have to go through the trouble of reading it again n again....ain't I considerate??)....well first things first...

1.I have to stand up for myself...no one, mind it NO ONE will stand up for me..!!(realized it yesterday!)

2.A smile from my dad can actually brighten up my saddest moods and days!! :-) :-)

3.Shopping for my mom gives me the ultimate satisfaction & pleasureeeeeeee:-)

4.Since a couple of weeks I have been missing Avani's early morning calls(arnd 10.30 am) and her patent dialogue...."soo rahi hai??soo jaa soo jaa..";-)

5.That long distance relationships actually work (nope,not the Love Aaj Kal angle ;-))…Hell I feel closer to Mansi, now that she is in Delhi, than when she was in Mumbai.

6.Talking to Avani calms my nerves. I would have died of a heart attack or brain hemorrhage by now....what with the amount of tension (read unnecessary) I take….n besides I get worked up soooooo fast!!

7.A person can walk out of your life at the word go, if they want to and will stay back if they really want and wish to.

8.I can talk non-stop on the phone for more than 2 hours!

9.Probably I am a lil toooo harsh on my elder sis regarding our room's cleanliness...do I see you grin??

10.I can actually cook palatable food.

11.I still think about my first crush (that was way back in school) once in a while, though not with fondness!

12.I can watch Shinchan non stoppppppppppppppp

13.I still get panic attacks thinking about 26/11.

14.I can watch Roadies (all seasons)episodes back to back....again n again...

15.The new hairstyle actually suits me….hell that’s altleast what my folks are saying.....hold on my dentist also told me it looks cool! :-)

16. I hateeee shopping....but I have to do a lot of it in the coming month (With god's wish).

17.Contrary to what I thought, I actually enjoyed cooking for my dad n bro when my sis n mom were away in b'lore :-)

18.I hateeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee lizards....they drive me crazyyyyy!

19.Hard work pays in the long run.

20.Topping in college didn't give me the happiness, I expected it would.

21.Sangeeta's laughter is like medicine.(realized it last nite) :-)

22.I need to have a check over my temper.

23.I should actually worship my mom, since she puts with my not sooo needed tantrums every now n den....sorry mommy!!(Last nite also I was rudeee :-(:-( )

24.I, perhaps may finally wear heels in the coming months (if my feet permits, with God's wish yet again)yipeeeeee!

25.I do actually have a creative side...altleast I like to believe so ;-)

26.Its high time I must thank Mansi & Sangeeta for having introduced me to the blogging world(Ohh I m lovingggg it) and Hari for saying “try it..if you don't like it stop it...there's noo harm" :-)

27.I love penning down my thoughts...I hope I happen to post dem all!!

28.I can sleep endlesslyyyy and till I am forced out of bed.

29.I miss my college....lecs, pracs and all the fun I had...at least I like to believe I had!!

30.I love it when my brother calls me chulbuli, bacche and off late bacchi....though I pretend as if I detest it..;-)

31.I am actually looking forward to my visit to b'lore, though my first visit in the yr 2006 was awful, horrible, sad, bad, sick, faltoo, bakwaaaasss........

32.After a period of sadness, happiness follows :-)& sadlyyyy sadness again follows :-(..!

33.Some people are scared of owning or perhaps flaunting their relationship/friendship in public....wonder whyyyyyyyy.... :-(...do u kno??

34.These days I am obsessssed with wearing kohl in my eyes...n besides my bro also approves of it….he says it suits me...!!I love him..!! :-):-):-) (noooo....certainly not cos he gave me the green signal...otherwise also..!!)

35.I should have a check over my language (read foul) and not get worked up on lil issues....its bad for the heart isn’t it??

36.Its High time I start drinking a cuppa milk daily, my knees are already giving me trouble...god am I growing old??

37.I am best when I am my chirp self..(my dad told me so yesterday :-)..)

38.I regret not having spoken to the guy whom I had a crush on during my graduation days!!

39.I have watched 'jab v met' at least more than eight times....n can watch it another eight times!

40.I love watching Hollywood movies on tv (all d old ones included....and they become my fav instantly, stepmom is d latest one...saw it yesterday...lovedddddd it!!)

41.I was blessed to have done my PG project under my guide at ACTREC....n I miss my lab terriblyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! :-( :-( :-(

42.Receiving texts from my frnds give me happinessss!

43.I am much more worried about the safety of my near and dear ones...than about mine....v all are that way.....no??

44.Reading other peoples blog gives happiness of a different kind....am I weird??

45.13th after all may not be all that unlucky...or is it...gosh I am confused!(For people who have forgotn n odrs who don kno...well I was born on the 13th...which much against the wishes of my near n dear ones I percieve to be unlucky!)

46.I actually feel proud when my dad consults or asks me to explain some one's medical report...I love MLT ;-)(For pple who do not know...MLT is...Medical Laboratory Technology)!!

47.I really hate the fact that I never had the opportunity to interact with my grandparents...they expired when I was a young girl :-(

48.I am unreasonable most of the times…!!

49.I love it when my frnds call me "khush" n off late "sweetie" too!!

50.I love using the words “actually”(as u wld have already noted;-)) & “ perhaps”!!

51.Perhaps;-) Research is my forte….!!:-)

52.Thanks to my sisters my dream of having my own library one day seems to be coming true…keep em coming!!!!;-)

53.I am verrrrry veerrrrrrryyyy happy for my eldest sis!!

54.I have realized too lil things in life….or is it too much??;-)

55.I must thank you all for reading this….so thnx a ton!! Keep visiting….!!

PS: ....That maybe I bored you ;-) :-)

...and Veronica closed her eyes!!

2009-08-13T11:59:00.007-04:00

She was suffocating...trying hard to breathe...struggling.....nothing seemed to help.

She gave up...she was tired of being the perfect daughter,the perfect sister,the perfect friend...but amidst all this where was she??Who was she??Did anyone care about her individuality...??

She was crying now,uncontrollably...who was she...she wondered...she opened her mouth, a desperate move so that she could gulp in air...alas!nothing worked!

Her condition was only getting worse by the minute.

She wanted to live...in its real sense, a life she had always dreamt of ...a carefree life...a happy life...a life on her terms and conditions...

She smiled...a weak smile...the overdose of sleeping pills were showing its magic.

Her vision was getting faint...in another desperate move she tried to look at her palm...she strained her eyes...to her dismay she could see nothing...!

She gave up...and Veronica closed her eyes!!

A love note!!

2009-08-03T01:36:00.000-04:00

A love note from the point of view of a woman...a wife to the love of her life...her husband on their third wedding anniversary!!

Those morning walks
Those endless talks
That stolen kiss
That unbeatlable bliss
That undue attention
& my ever rising tension.

That surprise flowers
and the unexpected showers
That two hour wait
for our first date
That charming smile
I had not seen in a while.

My shopping spree
You hated it, you did agree
Your crazy work schedule
Had our meetings rescheduled
Our never ending fights
and me crying through the nights.

That wait for your calls
and the food court in the malls
We holding hands
and walking on the sands
That look in your eyes
and the sad goodbyes.

We tied the knot
and then partied on a yatch
That perfect honeymoon
in the month of june
That ultimtate romance
in the country of France...

I love you
and will never bid adieu
I knew you were the one
ever since we begun
On our third anniversary
I wish we soon have our nursery!

Go For It..!!!

2009-07-19T05:51:00.006-04:00

Neena got down from the crowded train,to be precise she managed to get off the overcrowded train.She composed herself and set her hair.She then started moving swiftly towards the exit.She was a nervous wreck today.Finally she thought to herself....finally today....after 4 yrs....finally....she would tell him...let him kno....

FlAsHbAcK...

Marc hailed a rick on a rainy evening and to his surprise found a file on the seat.After a moment of deliberation he opened the zipper of the file and scanned through the papers.

"Neena Jose", the file belonged to some Neena Jose.After a number of checks through the paper, he got her address.In all this he didn't hear the person sitting ahead of him speak

"sahab,15 rupiyee yahin utarna hai na?" In an irritated tone this time.
Marc hurriedly gave the cash and got down,the file comfortably tucked in his hands.Tomorrow ..he thought I will go and return the file.
He perhaps didn't know that the finest years of his life awaited him...
Next day Marc left early,so that he wouldn't be late for work.He read and re-read the address a number of times,it was towards the other end of the city.But I have to go, he thought.....It was his fate that was pushing him.He managed to reach the building, the locality was beautiful he thought to himself. Mustering courage he rang the bell.
"Ting-Tong". No answer.
"Ting-Tong". This time it was answered....A middle aged woman opened the door. Marc was disheartened, he had a picture of this Neena Jose in mind and this woman was far off from it.Never mind he thought;
"Neena Jose??"
"One second. Madam some one's here for you"
Marc smiled to himself.
"Yes?" Marc looked up and was mesmerised but manged to utter
"Neena Jose?"
"Yes".
"uhh...well I was travelling in a rick last night..."
"So??"What the hell am I supposed to do Neena thought to herself.
"I saw this file on the seat and I guess it belongs to you."Marc continued.
Neena looked at the file, her eyes aglowed with joy.Her happiness knew no bounds.She literally snatched the file and realised that Marc was standing on the door only after she had re-checked her certificates for the fourth time.Finally she looked up sheepishly
"Thankyou" she told.
"Thakyou" he told smiling.
She stared at him with a puzzled look.
This meeting was just the beginning....Fate had something in store for them....
One meeting led to the other and today was their fourth anniversary...the day they had met four years back....

Neena reached their fav food joint only to find Marc had not yet reached.Late again, she thought to herself but managed to a smile...a nervous smile.
After all, she was going to propose marriage to Marc today..!
She looked at her watch, it had been two hours since she had arrived...there was no sign of Marc. She tried his cell which obviously was not reachable. Frustration was creeping in now.In fact, she was beginning to feel uncomfortable because most of the waiters were staring at her awkwardly.
Another 15 mins, she thought to herself and I will leave.
15 mins later:nNo sign of Marc. Perhaps I should wait for another 15 mins she thought again.
So on and so forth...she had waited for another hour. She picked up her hand bag and dragged her self out of the restaurant.
With a heavy feet and heavier heart she boarded the next local home with a wish and hope that Marc would surprise her at home again.....her mind drifted back...

They had,had a huge argument then and then too Mrac had not shown up...on reaching home she had seen a number of bouquets of red roses and orchids (her fav) on the door, with a note that raed "I am sorrrrrryyy".Her heart had melted within seconds, whose wouldn't??

A huge bolt of the train brought her back to the present. She reached home hoping....
No sign of roses. No sign of Marc.
Tension replaced anger and frustation now.
No....she thought I am crazzzyy.
Even before she could find the keys of the door, she heard "Tring-Tring"
Marc..she thought and frantically searched for the keys, pushed the door open and ran towards the ringing phone.By now she was panting.
"Hello"She was trying to catch her breath.
No reply but a lot of background noise.
"Hello" she somehow managed again.
"Neena Jose??" It was a male's voice..
"y-e-s"
"Madam I am calling from the police station.." Her heart sunk...
"Marc met with an accident today,if you can please come and claim the body"
"Body" she repeated
She was on the floor trying to catch her breath....

"Why me??"
"Why us??"
I had not even let him know how precious and special he was to me and how much I loved him....she thought amidst tears....

Moral of the story (are we in kindergarten??)....Never mind..Let every one you treasure know...
How special they are to you...
How much they mean to you...
& you certainly are ready to walk that extra mile to see them smile.... :-)
Besides Reliance services I assume are cheaper these days....
As Hrithik rightly says......Go For It...!!!

At 23.......

2009-07-13T00:52:00.001-04:00

Today I turn 23 and on my birthday rather than celebrating I feel the need of introspection….to introspect how I have led my life till date, not that I remember the early days of my life…:-)….To realise what I have lost and what I have gained..
What I have learnt and what is left unlearnt…
How much I loved and how much I have been loved…
How much I have hated and how much I have been hated…
How much I have cried (Trust me I can cry at the drop of a hat…:-)) and how much I have made others cry….
How much I have hurt and how much I have been hurt………!!

My school days were the finest days of my life……it still brings a smile to my face, whenever I think of it….(these days toooo often)!!I used to be soooo happy wearing the school uniform and going to school…..!
Everything felt just so perfect….until our results were announced and there I was out of school facing a world that was so unknown to me…I lived a very protected life till then and never travelled by public bus or train…!

Having secured admission in JC, the initial days I really felt out of place….coming across tons of new faces and hearing tons of new names and trying to recall them the very next day, but ofcourse with failure…..:-)!!
My JC days were not really memorable except for Friendship and Rose days…!!
Yes I had a lot of fun..!!

What next was the big question…Though my dad always wanted me to be a doctor, I wasn’t really sure about it and Engineering…sorry boss…I hate maths… :-)!

Finally I took up Biotechnology and I really am happy because I love my field…..forget the opportunities part…..:-)!!
My graduation days I’ll always remember for reasons unknown….!! Thanks SWARALI (u r really sweet), Ruchi, Kruti, Isha, Hrishi, Poonam, Hiral, Saurabh, Maithili, AVANI..!!
I realised what friendship and yes what true friends meant…I was heartbroken when this realisation dawned….but as they say, Life moves on..!
Even with my snobbish attitude ( Hari will agree!!....:-)) I did manage to make some great friends…They are and will always be special in someway or the other..!!
Industrial tours were like an integral part of our course, PG included..!
In SY, we visited Bangalore..where I understood the meaning of friendship….I hated the trip but I survived it!
In TY we visited Pune…..started interacting with Avani….I really wish you would have walked into my life…earlier..!!

After graduation, pursuing a PG seemed like the best option…Avani helped me sail through it with ease……Thanks a ton darling for everything..!! You are a wonderful person and I feel blessed with you around….!Love you..
We visited Goa (Yes…another Industrial Tour) some of the best days of my life spent with my juniors….Thanks Shraddha, Neelomi, Ekta, Komal and Chinmayi.
Doing my Research Project at ACTREC was the most satisfying part of my PG, perhaps life…..Thank you ma’am for your support and how can I forget her daughter….I love you darling..!!:-)

Here, Today At 23… I face the same dilemma again (For d 3rd time)……what next?? (Thanks Hari for putting up wid me…..wid all d cribbing I have done…:-))
Through this entire journey of 23 yrs…my parents and siblings…. (??..:-)) have been a source of constant support and encouragement….Thanks a lot..!!

I have to thank a couple of other friends too…..who have made my life beautifullll..!!
Rashmi & Manisha…..for always bringing a smile to my face….and lightning up my life..!

Samhita….for being the patient listner…..and the endless chattering we did and still do….I miss u….

Rahul….for being a wonderful friend and putting up with me for soooo long… :-)

Mansi, Sangeeta, Rachana….I am sooooo glad I met you all in life….I hope we stay in touch forever……You guys really are special..!

Last but not the least…A friend of mine….we are no more in touch with each other….but thankyou very much for everything. The day we stopped talking, I thought I would never smile, laugh or live normally again…..but how wrong I was…Here I am smiling…
Life indeed does move on…..& I don’t miss him anymore….:-)

Sounds like a thank you speech huh???
Nope…..its not one….I have a lot to achieve….probably look up this blog after another 10 yrs..( I hope I keep blogging)….I’ll have another set of people to thank….:-)

Sooo…..many lessons learnt but still many more to learn…...& many things to unravel...

I look forward to the next year & MY journey in Life with HOPE…!!:-)